The Hippo's Ass

The Department of Justice Visited My Blog and All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt

2009-10-09T05:30:00.003-04:00

Back in August I posted a few videos of Rep. John Dingell's Town Hall on Health Care. Over the next few days I wasn't surprised to see a few visits from House.gov and Senate.gov on my web site. As you can see, near the bottom of my blog is a counter that tracks visits to this site. I can't tell who visited, but I can see what I.P. address they were using.

Imagine my surprise that a few weeks later I see that someone from DOJ.gov logged onto my site.

That's right: The Department of Justice. Why would they be looking at my blog, a blog that was getting at that time an average of 50 visitors a day? Sure, I have been critical of the Obama Administration, but there has been nothing on this site that broke any laws in anyway.

Well, I may have found my answer.

The New Republic Online posted this story on October 6th:

Is the Department of Justice engaging in fraud, or is it simply trying to hide its propaganda? Those of you wondering how DOJ uses your tax dollars to enforce our nation’s laws might be interested to learn that Eric Holder has apparently hired former Democratic campaign bloggers to work at the department in what appears to be a secret propaganda unit. According to a story at The Muffled Oar website, the bloggers are housed in the Office of Public Affairs (the press office). Their job is to place “anonymous comments, or comments under pseudonyms, at newspaper websites with stories critical of the Department of Justice, Holder and President Obama.” One of the bloggers is former DNC and John Edwards staffer Tracy Russo, whose name was featured prominently on the department’s introduction of its new website on October 1.

Matthew Miller Director of Public Affair at the Justice Department told the Washington Times:

"There is no 'blog squad'. There is Tracy [Russo] who handles online media. It’s the policy of the office of public affairs to not post anonymous comments. We have not seen any evidence that anyone does post comments, and if we did have evidence of that, people would no longer work here."

Mr. Miller countered accusations of the existence of a "blog squad" pointing to what he says is lack of evidence.

Except for the fact that the DOJ.gov was on my site back in August. Now maybe I gained a fan from someone in Attorney General Holder's office, but considering it was a one time visit, I figure they were looking for something.

Are we seeing a trend develop in the Obama Administration? First we read about employees working out of the White House to get artists to work with the National Endowment for the Arts to create propaganda that will "push" the President's agenda on health care. Now we may have the Department of Justice scanning web sites for dissent against the policies of the White House.

What's next? Stay Tuned....

If you like what you read, please become a fan of The Hippo's Ass on Facebook, feel free to reblog us on your site, or follow us on Twitter @thehipposass. If you see something that is worthy of being on The Hippo's Ass, please email us the story or video at hipposass@gmail.com

When Orchids Are Made Illegal, only Criminals Will Own Orchids.

2009-10-08T05:30:00.001-04:00

We are all becoming criminals. Here is yet another example of the Government overreaching its authority and criminalizing ordinary citizens who had no intention of breaking the law.

In 2006, Federal Agents burst through the door of the home Kathy and George Norris, 60 and 66 year old Grandparents of six grandchildren. They ransacked the house, overturned drawers, emptied bookshelves, threw the Norris' belongings on the floor and searched their home.

Were these SWAT clothed agents from the FBI? The ATF? Homeland Security?

Nope. They were from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service....and their mission: Looking for illegal orchids.

That's right. Orchids. Seems that Mr. Norris, who owned a home-based business cultivating, importing and selling legal orchids, did the unthinkable: he ordered perfectly legal orchids from a supplier overseas, but failed to fill out the necessary paperwork properly. The result? Mr. Norris spent two years in prison.

As Brian W. Walsh writes:

The judge who sentenced George had some advice for the Norrises: “Life sometimes presents us with lemons.” Their job was to, yes, “turn lemons into lemonade.”

Never mind how difficult it is to run a successful lemonade stand when you’re a diabetic with coronary complications, arthritis and Parkinson’s disease serving time in a federal penitentiary. If only George had been a Libyan terrorist, maybe some European official would have lobbied to secure a health-based mercy release.

Common sense would tell you that a simple inquiry into the background of Mr. and Mrs. Norris would have shown that they were not smugglers, but simply two citizens that have done what many in Washington have done, filled out their paperwork improperly. When a politician does this, its OK; when two grandparents do so, it means two years in a federal penitentiary.

If you like what you read, please become a fan of The Hippo's Ass on Facebook, feel free to reblog us on your site, or follow us on Twitter @thehipposass. If you see something that is worthy of being on The Hippo's Ass, please email us the story or video at hipposass@gmail.com

Speaking the Unspeakable: Rosemary's Baby Isn't "Good-Good"

2009-10-07T05:30:00.003-04:00

Quick

Name three Roman Polanski films. (Don't use IMDB.com)

Rosemary's Baby
Chinatown
and......

Thought so.

These movies, plus many others in subtitles, seem to excuse this man of raping a 14 year old girl. According to Whoopi Goldberg, it wasn't "Rape-rape". Fellow cradle robber Woody Allen has come to Polanski's defense, as well as many other Hollywood directors and stars that seem to believe Polanski, being overseas, making movies, getting rich, enjoying Europe, winning awards, and generally being able to do his thing...has suffered enough while on the lam for running from the police for a crime he pled guilty to.

Debra Winger complains "the whole art world suffers" in such arrests. I beg to differ. Polanski should be in prison for subjecting the movie viewing world to the abomination that is Rosemary's Baby, an absolutely horrible horror film. I'm seen it twice hoping that after a second viewing it would get better.

It doesn't.

Weinstein Co. co-founder Harvey Weinstein, who is circulating the pro-Polanski petition said that people generally misunderstand what happened to Polanski at sentencing. Apparently so does Weinstein, who forgets that Polanski pled guilty.

The LA Times has this passage from Peg Yorkin, founder of the Feminist Majority Foundation:

"It's bad a person was raped. But that was so many years ago. The guy has been through so much in his life. It's crazy to arrest him now. Let it go".

They sure don't make feminists the way they used to, huh?

Have you thought of a third yet? (The correct answer is The Pianist or Frantic, actually Roman Polanski's Frantic). I will give Polanski this, The Pianist was a very good film. But it no way excuses the Hollywood elite from their obscene support of this rapist. Running off to Europe to live your life is not how most people convicted of the same crime do their "time". Ask yourself two questions: If this were you, how do you you think you would be treated? Why should we hold "celebrities" to any different standard?

All Animals are Equal; Some Animals are More Equal than Others.

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5 Year Old Boy Catches 800lb Gator

2009-10-02T05:30:00.001-04:00

The Hippo's Ass is taking a few days off to go fishing. I am heading Up North to Northern Lower Michigan for a weekend of hanging out with some old school buddies, sitting on the boat, drowning a few worms and maybe, just maybe, catching a Walleye or two. We have a rule though, "You Catch Em, You Clean Em."

Which leads me to this particular story.

Harvesting an alligator that's 20 times your size is a piece of cake, according to 5-year-old Simon Hughes. "Well, its pretty much simple," said Simon who caught the alligator.

Simon's father said Simon is a natural born hunter, so an 800 pound alligator was no match for him. "Well I my got my gun out and shot him," the 5 year old said laughingly.

Um...yeah.

Sometimes we just need to get away from the craziness and put all the worries behind us. Thoreau had the right idea: head into the woods near a pond and simplify, simplify.

Have a great weekend folks.

The character inherent in the American people has done all that has been accomplished; and it would have done somewhat more, if the government had not sometimes got in its way.

Killer Facebook Groups

2009-10-01T05:30:00.004-04:00

Is your baby a Facebook Hater or Lover?

The blog-o-sphere and the media (in their own little world) was all-a-buzz the other day when a poll on Facebook was discovered that asked if President Obama should be assassinated. Before it was removed, 700 people voted.

The Secret Service, we are told, has launched an investigation into who created the poll. This didn’t stop bloggers and pundits from speculating if this was an outgrowth of the anger from conservatives and "teabaggers" toward the current Administration. One commenter wrote:

It is truly amazing that no one ever considered doing anything this outrageous or disrespectful to Dubya, who was a much more inept Commander-In-Chief. His education credentials are bonafide, as opposed to Dubya who skated through school on the coattails of his father. And people have the nerve to think this is not racism?

A reader of the Huffington Post declared: "Glenn Beck is partially responsible for this."

My personal opinion is the creator of the poll is a sock-puppet, phishing for just enough idiots to respond to the poll to deduce that all opposition to President Obama wants him dead. Had any of the reporters or bloggers actually used the search function on Facebook, they would have found several groups on the social networking site dedicated to killing, or wanting the death of, a political leader, particularly the death of one George W. Bush.

This group professes that We all Want To Kill George Bush It has 427 members and has been on Facebook since 2007.

The "I Bet I Can find 1,000,000 People Who Wanted to Kill Bush Group has only 517 members. Their description states:

Come on is this how u can share ur feelings about bush..
I think that we dont want to put bush in prison, we dont want to burn him, we dont want him to get burned.
(WE WANT TO SEE HIM FRI TO DEATH)That little basterd

Stating, "LEts kill the fukin guy !!!" (sic) the "I bet i can find more than 200 people hu (sic) wanna SHOOT DOWN GEORGE BUSH" has 64 members and has one of those trendy WANTED: For Crimes Against Humanity posters that you see at campus novelty shops, right next to the I Heart Che T-shirts.

This particular group "If George Bush Wants To End Terrorism, He Should Go Ahead and Kill Himself" doesn't want to personally harm Bush. What I found interesting about this one was the picture of George Bush as Hitler. I thought progressives and liberals were all above that sort of thing???

Then I looked up Sarah Palin. Apparently if she had been elected Vice President, there would have been a number of Birkenstock wearing slackers that planned on killing themselves.

Will those group members that "wanted George Bush dead" be subjected to the same Secret Service Investigation that the Obama Assassination Poll creator was? Why did Facebook act so quickly on a President Obama themed question, yet has left these groups continue to exist for years? Or is it O.K. to want SOME people dead, but not others?

If you like what you read, please become a fan of The Hippo's Ass on Facebook, feel free to reblog us on your site, or follow us on Twitter @thehipposass. If you see something that is worthy of being on The Hippo's Ass, please email us the story or video at hipposass@gmail.com

Over-reaching Bureaucracy Goes After Babysitters and Grandmothers

2009-09-30T05:30:00.002-04:00

The TODAY Show on Tuesday featured a story you read here last week. A Michigan woman is threatened with a fine by the Michigan Department of Human Services for letting her neighbors' kids stay at her house before the school bus arrives.

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The shocking part is when a State of Michigan employee tells Lisa Snyder to have the kids "get an umbrella" as a solution to the problem. Meanwhile in Chicago, unsupervised kids go on a rampage.

Then there is this story from Terre Haute Indiana:

Sally Harpold is a grandmother of triplets who bought one box of Zyrtec-D cold medicine for her husband at a Rockville pharmacy. Less than seven days later, she bought a box of Mucinex-D cold medicine for her adult daughter at a Clinton pharmacy, thereby purchasing 3.6 grams total of pseudoephedrine in a week’s time.

The end result? Mrs. Harpold was led away in handcuffs by the police! Her "crime"? Purchasing more than 3 grams of pseudoephedrine within seven days. It carries a penalty of up to 60 days in jail and a $500 fine. The law was enacted to stop drug users from making methamphetamines. Another "well intentioned" law that oversteps its authority and ends up punishing or inconveniences the innocent.

Now Mrs. Harpold has to fight to clear her name all because two people in her family had the audacity to get a cold within a seven day period. The Prosecutor stated that "ignorance of the law is no excuse". What may be even scarier is realizing that there is a database out there that keeps all of your cold medicine purchases on file and flags the authorities when your weekly ration of Vick Formula 44 D has been surpassed.

In the end, all we do know is this: the bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of the ever expanding bureaucracy.

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Media Blackout on NEA Scandal Continues

2009-09-28T05:30:00.001-04:00

A Member of Artists Supporting Socialism

It’s been five days since questions were raised about the White House’s apparent desire to create a Department of Propaganda by leveraging Government funding for the NEA to create art that will push the administration’s agenda for Health Care.

A cursory search on CNN and MSNBC’s website show no stories about this by either “news” organizations. ABC and CBS both did one story about the scandal, but nothing since Yoshi Sergent, one of the key players in the conference call, resigned late last week from the White House.

Other news organizations that trumped the Most Trusted Name in News and… I don’t know what MSNBC’s cute name is:

The Washington Times
Associated Press (which by the looks of it, no one else picked up on)
Washington Post
Pajamas Media
The Insurance News Net
And 37 blogs

Are you fraking kidding me?!?!?

Thirty seven blogs have covered this story and CNN.com and MSNBC have YET to write ONE article? I mean I’d expect the obligatory “Attack on the Arts by Right Wing Conservatives” slant article by now.

The Michigan Babysitting Police

2009-09-27T08:11:00.003-04:00

This is a prime example of a law that was supposed to have good intentions, but ended having unintended consequences. As is usually the case, the law comes down on the wrong side of the issue, overextending its reach and creating more authoritarian control over our daily lives.

Lisa Snyder of Middleville is threatened by the State of Michigan for having the audacity to watch her neighbors kids. According to WZZM13 News, the neighborhood school bus stop is right in front of Snyder's home. It arrives after her neighbors need to be at work, so she watches three of their children for 15-40 minutes until the bus comes.

Let me repeat that...SHE WATCHES THREE KIDS.

Some nosy, bitter, "government-will take-care-of-me" neighbor called in a complaint to the Department of Human Services and the State issued Snyder a stern ~~warning~~ threat to get licensed or "face the consequences".

The law was obviously poorly written. When did we reach that point where government has such control over our daily lives? This woman was not babysitting 12 kids for 5 hours a day. She was simply doing a favor for her friends, watching out for their kids so they would be safe before they headed off to school.

The State of Michigan's response? They have no choice but to comply with state law.

If Government's "well intentions" go so astray in small issues like this, what gives you the confidence they won't for health care?

If you like what you read, please become a fan of The Hippo's Ass on Facebook, feel free to reblog us on your site, or follow us on Twitter @thehipposass. If you see something that is worthy of being on The Hippo's Ass, please email us the story or video at hipposass@gmail.com

Are You Racist? Use the Flowchart! (Plus... Violent Anarchists!)

2009-09-26T08:39:00.002-04:00

Former President Jimmy Carter called you a Racist.
Janeane Garafalo called you a Racist
According to Melissa Harris-Lacewell, professor of African-American studies at Princeton, words you use like "personal responsibility" are "code words for racism".
Chris Matthews of MSNBC doesn't believe that protests against health care can be anything other than racism.

Still confused on whether you are a racist or not in the post racial Presidency of Obama? Well, print this handy dandy flowchart and hang it in your cubicle or on your refrigerator. Next time you believe you have a legitimate issue with the current Administration in Washington, just follow the chart to see of you are really a racist or not. Fun for the whole family!

Michael Moore's movie, Capitalism: A Love Story isn't scheduled to be released for another week or so, but did the movie, which concludes that "Capitalism is Evil", help incite anarchist violence during the G20 Summit in Pittsburgh?

This week 20 leaders from around the globe met in Pittsburgh to discuss various economic issues plaguing developed nations. Outside the summit, police clashed with black-veiled protesters.

Mike Nance, 28, a graduate student from Philadelphia, said he had no problem with so-called anarchists vandalizing businesses. I don't think property violence is particularly immoral," he said.

Consider that lately, Moore has been busy promoting his new film, claiming that capitalism is actually legalized greed and that we need to do away with it. This is not much different with the rally cries heard outside the G20 summit this weekend.

When taxpayers turned vocal at Town Hall meetings this summer, the news media attacked this "angry crowd of racists" while commentators from The Huffington Post, Daily Kos and MSNBC feared that this will all turn to violence. Yet the opposite has occurred. Hundreds of thousands of taxpayers marched on Washington and reports of violence were non existent. Now 500 - 1,000 black-clad, veiled anarchists that are too lazy to get a job are in Pittsburgh and the police are making arrests daily, windows are being broken, tear gas is being used.

After the release of Michael Moore's movie, will Nancy Pelosi stand at a podium once again, invoke the turmoil of early 70's San Francisco, and bemoan the potential violence this movie will produce?

I'm betting she won't.

If you like what you read, please become a fan of The Hippo's Ass on Facebook, feel free to reblog us on your site, or follow us on Twitter @thehipposass. If you see something that is worthy of being on The Hippo's Ass, please email us the story or video at hipposass@gmail.com

An Inconvenient Friday: Stupid Hypocrisy, Windmills and Steve McNair

2009-09-25T05:30:00.002-04:00

The new "green" movie, The Age of Stupid, attacks the idea of flying in airplanes because the producers believe it is harmful for the environment. Guess how most of the promoters and producers of this film arrived at the Manhattan premiere? The answer is wonderfully provided in this video featuring Phelim McAleer who also posted his commentary at Big Hollywood:

Tilting at Windmills

Every two years, Michigan Governor Jenny Granholm comes up with an idea that she hopes will kick start the state's economy since the auto business went bust. A while ago it was the New Technology State, next was The Raise Taxes State, then it was the Canada's Garbage Dump State. Now its The Windmill State..or something, who knows. She is proposing putting these monstrosities in Saginaw Bay and in the Thumb Region of the state. Yeah, I want one of these in my backyard.

Crossing the Line for Halloween?

On second thought, maybe creating a Halloween scene that reenacts Steve McNair's murder scene WASN'T such a great idea

From D eadspin.com: A spokesperson for Kings Island, Don Helbig, said the following,

"There will not be a scene at our Halloween event that features Steve McNair or anyone that resembles him."

With video and pictures of the skeletons circulating online, Helbig at first declined to acknowledge that they had ever existed. "There was no reference to Steve McNair at all. No jersey, nothing." Upon being informed that the pictures and video were already online, Helbig again insisted that the skeletons would not be featured on Friday when the event opens. Pressed as to when the skeletons were removed from the park, Helbig stuck to his talking points. "Our event does not open until Friday," he said, "We meant him no disrespect."

Owner Strips Foreclosed Home: Blames Bank for Loan

2009-09-24T09:15:00.019-04:00

Evil Mortgage Lender Mr. Potter

We are not exactly sure what is going on with the producers over at NBC News and the TODAY Show, but the quality of people they are digging up for their news and interview segments has certainly been lacking. Last week, ignoring the whole ACORN scandal, they were only able to dig up a former neighbor, when police arrested accused murderer Raymond Clark, III. You can see the clip HERE.

Yesterday, The TODAY Show featured a segment detailing the latest “trend”: people in foreclosed homes are stripping them bare and selling the contents before turning the property over to the banks, going so far as even selling the toilets for $20.

In this video clip, NBC Reporter Kerry Sanders is talking with Zorene Brodek (sp?) who justifies her actions: (the key section is at 1:08)

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Sanders: What about the banks?
Foreclosed Homeowner: Well, It’s their tough luck. They (the bank) are the ones who gave me a loan that was really ridiculous in the first place, so they are stuck with it.

Really, Ms. Foreclosed Former Homeowner? The bank held a gun to your head and made you get a loan? They are the ones that are responsible for you not investigating what you were getting yourself into? Did they hold one of your relatives hostage so you’d sign the loan?

I’m not sure what the situation was that caused Ms. Foreclosed Former Homeowner to stop making her payments to the bank. Maybe it was a lost job; maybe it was a personal illness. Regardless, blaming the bank for your inability to make payments smacks of personal entitlement. And for NBC News to just let her statement hang there, solidifying the notion that “Evil Mortgage Lenders” are behind the whole mortgage crisis is beyond irresponsible.

And thus the Age of Personal Responsibility comes to a close, not with a bang, but with mighty whining and snooty indignation to a reporter from NBC News.

Nothing is your fault anymore, Americans.

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Yes We Can Sell Out

2009-09-23T05:00:00.003-04:00

"A government-supported artist is an incompetent whore!" -- Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land

It's been more than 24 hours since BigGovernment went live with their report on how the Obama administration used the National Endowment for the Arts to push their agenda, specifically for health care. I don’t know about you, but this turns the hair on the back of my neck straight up. We all know that money sometimes wrongly gets funneled to “charities or corporations of choice” during any administration. Bush was accused of improperly funding Blackwater and Haliburton, Obama has ACORN and Community Organizers. But using the NEA to push a certain agenda focus smacks of propaganda.

Wait...didn't hear about it? Of course you didn't. The Old World Media has kept it under wraps pretty well.

The last time BigGovernment broke a story that was unfavorable to the Obama Administration *cough ACORN *cough it took days for the Ostrich Media to report it or in some cases nearly ignore it.

So we here at The Hippos Ass decided to track how long it takes for the media to actually cover this story. We decided to track the web sites of ABC News, CNN, MSNBC, CBS and The New York Times, as well as explore what other websites are covering this story.

Day 1 Search for National Endowment for the Arts

CNN Nothing
MSNBC Nothing
ABCNews One story (Charlie Gibson probably didn't want to be embarrassed again)
CBS News One Story CBS's story is very much a CYA story from the administration)
The New York Times One story...same story as CBS. Hmmmmmm
The Washington Post is covering...O'Keefe and Giles?

So going into day two of the Media Blackout Finals we have CNN and MSNBC. Stay tuned.

There is a certain creepiness behind this whole scenario. Take the opposite stand if you will for one moment. Imagine if President Bush, in the run up to the Iraq War, had asked the NEA to create Pro War art and songs. The whole mess would never have gotten past the initial email invite before there was an uproar from the liberal community and the press. They would be justified as well. This is not the purpose behind the National Endowment for the Arts.

Artists have always been looked upon as pushing the boundaries of the status quo, forcing us to look outside the little boxes we live in and view reality from a different angle. Art does have a very prominent place in a well educated and cultured society. All the more reason for the Federal Government to stay the hell out of it. The fear of Government funding has always been that one administration or other would seek to control the funded organization for some nefarious purpose.

The transcripts from BigGovernment.com show all too well that this was a coordinated attempt to use art to help push through the Obama Administration's agenda. The art community seem to have found it easy to sell out for a few pieces of the Government Pie.

A pie that you and I pay for. And right on the heals of the media ignoring the ACORN and NEA Scandals, we find that the Obama Administration is open to the idea "aid" for newspapers...(find out more in tomorrow's Hippos Ass).

It may be time to pull out my well worn copy of Orwell again.

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Deception Not En-Dearing

2009-09-21T06:41:00.001-04:00

Jai-Lee Dearing, Candidate for Detroit City Council, tried to defy the laws of physics by being in two different locations at the same time. (I think it’s physics…the only thing I know about physics is from watching Star Trek)

The Detroit Free Press was conducting a live chat with council candidates and on Thursday it was Dearings turn. Except that at the time, he was appearing live on WCHB with two other candidates.

When challenged in the chat, the Fake Jai-Lee Dearing wrote: “I have a member of my staff in the studio typing for me and I am approving these answers before they come to you”

Except that he wasn’t.

The “chat” was being conducted by Mike Carroll, Dearing’s campaign manager. The hosts of the program he was on confirmed to the Free Press that no notes were passed to the candidate.

Not the first time Dearing has had some controversy during his campaign. According to the Detroit News:

Dearing, who is waging his third run for council, stumbled twice last month over fliers. Days after the primary, he had to disavow one that featured scantily-clad women. Later, he caught flack for another that listed endorsements from notables such as the Rev. Horace Sheffield III who hadn't given their support.

This upcoming election is very important to the citizens of Detroit. As a tax payer to the city who is not allowed to vote due to taxation without representation, I would love to be able to help choose the future leaders of the city. Unfortunately I cannot. Detroiters can and need to be wary of who they vote for.

If they are looking for change, a candidate that endeavors to deceive is not change: its just another Kwame Kilpatrick or Monica Conyers.

TODAY Show Runs Out of Quality People to Interview

2009-09-18T06:00:00.002-04:00

We've been wondering why NBC has devoted hardly anytime to the snowballing scandal surrounding ACORN. What could be preventing them from covering one of the hottest topics in the past seven days?

Well, Thursday morning, police in Connecticut were sitting outside the apartment of Raymond Clark, III, getting ready to arrest him for the murder of Annie Le, the young Yale graduate student who dissapeared a week ago. Her body was found inside a wall in the research laboratory where she worked.

NBC's Today Show, with Meredith Vieira, was right there to bring us the latest with this exclusive interview of a neighbor, er... ex-neighbor. Their crack research staff, obviously pulled off the ACORN investigation, pulled out all the stops to get the exclusive to this first hand report "inside the mind of Raymond Clark, III"

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An exclusive into the mind of a killer...? Ann Marie Goodwin knows, cause eyes are the window to a person's soul...or something. Well, he owned 2 pit bulls...who yelped all day. And he didn't like the apartment. This was the best TODAY could come up with? An Ex-Neighbor? The look on Meridith's face at the end of this interview is truly a classic.

Meanwhile, the near media blackout of coverage on ACORN continued.

Except on Twitter. #acorn was a trending topic the past two days, beaten only by such earth-shattering topics as #kaynewest, #jackass (which is code for Kanye West) and #happybirthdaynick, who I find out later was not for Nick Lachey, but for Nick Jonas from the Jonas Brothers. Imagine MY embarrassment....

Yesterday afternoon the Republicans slipped the Defund ACORN Act into the Student Aid and Fiscal Responsibility Act of 2009, which passed 345 - 75. All 75 nay votes were Democrats, including Detroit's own Momma Kilpatrick herself, Carolyn Cheeks Kilpatrick from Michigan's 13th District.

Momma Kilpatrick's son Kwame Kilpatrick, the former Mayor of Detroit, who pled guilty to two felonies, was removed from office and served jail time. He now makes $10,000 a month in Texas working for a Compuware subsidiary, lives in a monster house, drives a Cadillac Escalade and owes the City of Detroit $6,000 a month till he pays off the $1 million he cost the city. He recently petitioned the courts to drop his payment to $6 a month. I KID YOU NOT!

Just an FYI for any young reporters out there looking for something to do...Detroit has a local ACORN Chapter.

Just saying.

Embarrassed By Two Independent Reporters, The Media Finally (sorta) Notices ACORN

2009-09-17T07:08:00.002-04:00

What does it say when John Stewart covers a story before Katie, Brian, and Charlie?

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

The Audacity of Hos

www.thedailyshow.com

Daily Show
Full Episodes

Political Humor

Healthcare Protests

ACORN suspended operations yesterday, calling the actions of their employees at four separate locations indefensible. This was after ACORN Bertha Lewis called the BigGovernment videos a scam, that ACORN employees were just "playing along", which came right after they claimed they were suing FoxNews for making ACORN their Willie Horton for 2009, which wasn't too long after they called this an isolated incident.

Next up? Bertha Lewis saying "we would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you meddling kids"?

Zoinks!

The Gang at BigGovernment.com

CNN finally got around to writing an article on the controversy for their web site, after six days of ignoring the whole damn thing. Wolf Bitzer did exactly what you would expect, get the "victim" on for some screen time:

MSNBC took two days off from covering the affair, but the TODAY show did go out of their way this morning to mention that ACORN's spokesman was quoted as saying the whole thing is faked. (Someone must not have given him the memo that said they were going to suspend their operations for a bit). Ed Shultz couldn't help putting Nuts vs ACORN on the screen:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Charlie Gibson, meanwhile, was replaced by a rock, who broke the story that the Earth was round. Gibson was quoted as saying "well, that's the first I heard about this."

The New York Times did finally write an article as well, however the reporter couldn't help throwing in the usual labels (as Newsbusters reports)

portraying the scandal in pure political terms, with "the right" as "gleeful" in claiming its "latest scalp," as opposed to expressing outrage over a tax-funded leftist organization with connections to the Census Bureau and IRS (!) encouraging tax evasion and child prostitution. Shane couldn't even bring himself to call the housing activists at ACORN leftist; instead he said "the right" are trying to weaken Obama "by attacking allies and appointees they view as leftist.

Stay tuned to The Hippo's Ass for further updates, as we hear the kids over at BigGovernment have plenty more videos to show. Since the Ostrich Media refuses to cover this story, I guess it's up to us bloggers to spread the word. Follow us on Twitter @thehipposass or become a fan on Facebook. If you have a tip or would like to send in a story, email us at hipposass@gmail.com

See no Evil; Why Is the Media Refusing to Cover the Acorn Scandal?

2009-09-16T07:14:00.002-04:00

It is day five of our CNN.com ACORN Watch. The Hippo's Ass has been monitoring the CNN web site for the past few days looking for any indication they are aware of the astonishing events surrounding the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now.

According to CNN.com's own search engine, the last time CNN wrote a story about ACORN was September 10, 2009

1 Day before the Obama Administration fired ACORN from their Census collection program.

2 Days before a third video (this time in New York) surfaced showing workers giving questionable advice to filmakers posing as a pimp and a prostitute.

3 Days before the Senate took up a vote to add an amendment to the Housing bill to cut all funding to ACORN. Seven members of the Senate voted to keep funding ACORN.

4 Days before a fourth video is broadcast, this time of a worker telling how she "laid some groundwork" before shooting her abusive husband dead.

Five Days.

Five days and not one written story on the CNN.com web site. Oh, there are a few video clips hidden on the site (you really have to look for them) but nothing on the front page. One video clip is from Lou Dobbs of all people, but doesn't really address the videos, just politicians' ties to ACORN (and they make it sound like they are doing an "investigation".) Another video is of an ACORN lawyer calling the undercover videos a sham.

This is the last article they wrote about ACORN:

ACORN workers caught on tape allegedly advising on prostitution updated Thu, September 10, 2009
Two employees at the Baltimore, Maryland, branch of the liberal community organizing group ACORN were caught on tape allegedly offering advice to a pair posing as a pimp and prostitute on setting up a prostitution ring and evading the IRS.

CNN is not alone.

Charlie Gibson of ABC News told WLS AM in Chicago, yesterday morning was the first he heard of it!"(of the scandal)

MSNBC's coverage has been mainly about Joe Wilson and whether or not the Tea Party participants are racist.
CBS...are they still around?
Rachel Maddow is making teabagging jokes (as if she knows....)
The big story on Monday was Kanye West. The big story on Tuesday? It was a toss up between Joe Wilson getting his hand slapped and President Obama calling Kanye West a Jackass.

Well, I guess a broken clock IS right twice a day.

The House of Representatives is set to vote on the amendment that will cut funding for ACORN, an organization that is tied to SEIU (who have been a force behind the Health Care Debate) and to President Obama himself.

But if Sarah Palin makes a statement about Death Panels, you can be sure CNN, Keith Olbermann, Rachel Maddow and the New York Times will be all over it.

Today, the top story is former President Carter calling dissent against the Obama Administration based on Racism. As I type this, the TODAY show is saying this is a "conservative" sting and ACORN has "long been the target of conservative". Well at least they are finally reporting it.

The fact is, the main stream media was upstaged by two young adults, aged 25 and 20, who spent all of $1,800 on this investigation and exposed one of the largest community organizations in the country as being crooked and corrupt, an organization that stood to gain billions of tax payer money, and an administration that is tied to the President of the United States. (oops, sorry Jimmy...I must be racist for saying that.)

The media outlets that were known for being mainstream are now the Ostrich Media, their sense of self importance and worth leading them by the hand to obscurity and shown the door by a filmmaker in a bad pimp outfit you'd never even think twice about wearing for halloween.

And my little obscure blog that averages now 112 readers a day has printed more stories in the past few days about this scandal than a Global Media Conglomerate. Pretty pathetic don't you think?

Send a message or a twitter to the news outlets and tell them to get off their butts. Here is a list of media twitter addresses (thanks to Resist Tyranny Now)

ABC @abcnews

George Stephanopoulos @GStephanopoulos

Jake Tapper @jaketapper

CBS @CBSnews

Katie Couric @katiecouric

Mark Knoller @markknoller

CNN @cnn

Alexander Mooney @AWMooneyCNN

Anderson Cooper @andersoncooper

Allison Blakely @AllisonCNN

Don Lemon @donlemonCNN

J. Smith @JSmith_CNN

Kim Segal @CNNkimsegal

Kristie Lu Stout @klustout

Rick Sanchez @ricksanchezCNN

Saad Abedine @CNNSaadAbedine

Suzanne Malveaux @SuzanneMalveaux

Fox

Glenn Beck @GlennBeck (send him a thank you)

Huffington Post @HuffingtonPost

MSNBC @msnbc_breaking

Joe Scarborough @JoeNBC

Rachel Maddow @maddow

NBC @NBCnews

David Gregory @davidgregory

New York Times @NYTimes

Nicholas Kristof @nytimeskristof

Opinion @nytimesopinion

Politics @nytimespolitics

USA Today @USAToday

If you like what you read, please reblog or pass us along to your friends and family; become a fan on Facebook or follow us on Twitter @thehipposass

UPDATE This afternoon CNN.com posted a video that attempted to explain the ACORN scandal; a link was added to the front page of their web site. In the clip, a good deal of time was given to the spokesman for ACORN who called the video a "scam". Later in the day, ACORN suspended some of their operations, calling the actions of their employees "indefensable".

CNN has yet to publish any WRITTEN article on their site abput the scandal since September 10...now 6 days ago.

The Ball is in Nancy's Court

2009-09-15T08:00:00.004-04:00

What was virtually improbable a week ago, the Senate voted 83 - 7 to add an amendment to H.R.3288 (Making appropriations for the Departments of Transportation, and Housing and Urban Development, and related agencies) that would cut funding to ACORN, the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now.

The Johanns Amendment is #2355 to H.R. 3288.

Johanns cited the BigGovernment.com sting videos as evidence that ACORN cannot be trusted with government money:

“Until a full investigation is launched into ACORN, no taxpayer money should be used to fund its activities. A vote in favor of my amendment is a vote in favor of the taxpayer and a vote against the status quo.”"

Only seven Senators, all Democrats, who are being called the Child-Whoring Pimp Assitance 7 voted to continue funding the organization whose employees gave advice to a fake pimp and prostitute looking to import underage girls for exploitation, get a house loan without a job and looking to avoid paying taxes.

Ladies and Gentlemen...The Child-Whoring Pimp Assistance 7

Burris (D-IL)
Casey (D-PA)
Durbin (D-IL)
Gillibrand (D-NY)
Leahy (D-VT)
Sanders (I-VT)
Whitehouse (D-RI)

ACORN CEO Bertha Lewis said the following after learning of potentially being cut from the taxpayer's teat:

"We're disappointed that the Senate took the rare and politically convenient step of supporting eliminating some federal funding for a single organization, one that has been the target of an historical political assault stemming variously from the Bush White House, Fox News, and other conservative quarters," said Bertha Lewis, CEO of ACORN, in a statement after the Senate vote. "Fortunately, ACORN derives most of its income from its members and other supporters, so the decision will have little impact on overall operations. Tonight's vote will burden the families who benefited from ACORN's important work to improve housing conditions in the United States."

Wait...What?? It will have little impact but it will also be a burden? Whatever... Cutting federal funds and forcing this non-profit organization to raise their own money from members is a good thing. If ACORN can't sustain themselves without TRUE public support, then they do not deserve to be around.

The amendment will now go before Nancy Pelosi and the House of Representatives. Will they bury the amendment, turn it down, ignore it or do the right thing: Pass it by an overwhelming majority. I can't wait to see who votes against this.

Or will "the powers that be" kill the whole thing, like he/they did when Rep. John Conyers tried to investigate these crooked organization earlier this year?

Last night, CNN.com, as of 10:00 pm had yet to post any story at all about the vote, ACORN, or the videos.

Stay tuned to #thehipposass or follow @thehipposass on Twitter for updates throughout the day. If you like what you read, make us your friend on Facebook or reblog us.

New Zealand Tops CNN in ACORN Reporting

2009-09-14T16:54:00.014-04:00

You know it’s Autumn when every time you turn around, acorns are falling from the tree. You have to be vigilant: if you leave them there on the ground, they will 1) ruin the grass that you worked very hard to maintain and 2) sprout more trees that will take over your yard.

Big news of the day? Kanye West made an ass out of himself at the MTV Video Music Awards last night. I didn’t see it, but how do I know it happened: It was one of the top stories on the TODAY show this morning.CNN featured the "incident" on their web site. In fact, as of 1:00 pm this afternoon, it was the lead story of the day until President Obama started admonishing Wall Street again.

A quick look on Google’s News search at the time resulted in more than 2,288 hits from such reputable news sources as:

TIME
Reuters
Los Angeles Times
New York Times
ABC News
Associated Press
Washington Post
The Huffington Post (O.K….my bad, this one shouldn’t fall in with the reputable group, but they still mentioned it.)

The other big story of the day? For the third time is less than 6 days, a video showing ACORN workers giving advice to a pimp and a prostitute was released by the good folks over at BigGovernment.com. This video features New York City ACORN workers giving advice on how to hide prostitution profits in a tin can buried in the back yard, how to lie when applying for a housing loan and ways to shelter the money for tax purposes.

The number of hits on Google search at 4pm this afternoon? 58.
Some of the news sites that covered the story?

Fox News
The Baltimore Sun
The New York Post
Examiner.com
The San Francisco Chronicle (the article was actually defending ACORN against the evil people that exposed them)
And THE NEW ZEALAND HERALD???

No Kidding...True Story. The New Zealand Herald actually put out a story on the third video before CNN did. (The last article on CNN.com about ACORN was four days ago.) Not only does New Zealand make a great setting for Middle Earth, they also know when to call a scandal a scandal, unlike some of our more prominent news organizations here in the United States. Seriously, when was the last time you read about a scandal in New Zealand?

Hell, looking up Blackwater Contractors will give you more than 1,000 hits from various news sites.

What is it about ACORN that the media turns a blind eye towards? What are they afraid will happen should they do some real investigative work on this organization that stands to get billions of taxpayer money and has been involved in numerous incidents of voter registration fraud, the housing scandal and now these videos? It certainly is a tough nut to crack. (sorry)

Good thing you have The Hippo’s Ass to report on these stories. Otherwise you’d be left talking about Lady Gaga’s outfit from the VMAs.

(Should I know who she is???)

We here at The Hippo's Ass have a feeling that this is not the last of the ACORN videos to surface. Should any more come to light, you know where you can turn to get the news other outlets refuse to cover: The Hippo's Ass....and The New Zealand Herald.

ACORN is a Criminal Enterprise

2009-09-12T09:05:00.010-04:00

ACORN was trying to register Mickey Mouse during 2008 Election

Each week we look forward to the Friday News Dump, that special time when the Government "dumps" a news story that will be unfavorable to them should it be well publicized. The theory being the public will be too busy to pay attention to the news during the busy weekend and when the news cycle begins on Monday, the "dropped" story will be old news.

Yesterday, Obama Administration literally dropped one of its biggest supporters: ACORN (Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now)

The week didn't start out so well for ACORN. First they announced they had to fire several workers in Florida for registering false names during the last presidential election. (Imagine that...pitty someone didn't warn voters about them last year.)

Then a very damaging YouTube video was posted by BigGovernment showing ACORN workers in Baltimore giving advice on how a prostitute and a pimp could avoid paying taxes on the underage El Salvadorean sex workers the couple were going to import.

ACORN quickly fired the workers, saying that it was an isolated incident and that it was just a smear campaign by Conservatives.

In what can only be called a classic "one-two" punch, a SECOND video, this time showing District of Columbia workers doing the exact same thing.

Bertha Lewis, Chief Organizer, ACORN Regarding Recent News Reports:

We are their Willy Horton for 2009. We are the boogeyman for the right-wing and its echo chambers. If ACORN did not exist, the right-wing would have needed to create us in order to achieve their agenda, their missions, their ideal, retrograde America.

Three Scandals in one week to an organization that was connected in the last election to our current President and nary a word on the major news sites. Well it's a good thing you follow The Hippo's Ass. We report what the main News Sites fail to cover.

Which brings us to the Friday News Dump. The Administration announced that ACORN was being dropped as a "participant" in the upcoming census. MSNBC's response? They showed an in-depth report on whether ShamWow really works or not.

Shouldn't someone be investigating these "community organizers" who stand to reap millions in tax payer dollars as part of the TARP bills recently passed to "help" the economy? Rep. John Conyers of Detroit was supposed to, but mysteriously he dropped the case one day before his wife Monica Conyers, a Detroit City Council member was brought up on bribery charges. Rep. Conyers claimed "powers that be" put the kibosh on the idea. Hmmm..... Anyone in the media care to follow that up? Didn't think so.

The kicker of the whole story? You have a National Community Organization that is connected to the President of the United States, being involved in voter registration tampering, tax evasion advice at TWO locations and counciling a prostitute how to hide underage El Salvadorean girls and what happens?

The State of Maryland may prosecute the FILMMAKERS who exposed ACORN as the Corrupt Organization they really are.

An you wonder why more than 1 million people marched on Washington D.C today?

Today I remember Stephen J. Cangialosi

2009-09-11T13:43:00.003-04:00

Stephen J. Cangialosi was forty years old the day he woke his wife to kiss her good bye, tell her he loves her, and leave for work as a bond trader at Cantor Fitzgerald in WTC Tower 1 on the 104th floor.

Today I am forty years old. This morning I woke my wife to kiss her goodbye, told her I loved her and left for work as well. The difference is I get to go home.

Stephen can not.

Eight years after September 11, I am only now learning who this man was. Today I signed up to be a part of Project 2,996, a group of bloggers each taking one victim of 9/11 and remembering them on this day. Coming late to this project, I didn’t have a lot of time to investigate who Stephen was.

I did learn that Stephen J. Cangialosi will be remembered for "The Shirt." Yes, he was a devoted father of two boys, a husband, loyal friend, successful bond trader at Cantor Fitzgerald and a die-heart Yankees fan.

But it was "The Shirt."

For years, he made fun of his Georgetown University classmate, Andy Stearns, for wearing a stained, plaid, late-1970's shirt with wide lapels throughout college. To get him back, Mr. Stearns wrapped it, threw a bow on the box and gave it to him as a gift. Not to be outdone, Mr. Cangialosi wrapped it in a big box with a bow and gave it back. That went on for about 17 years. It would turn up on holidays, birthdays and anniversaries.

We all have our horrible memories of that day. I was stuck in St. Louis that morning, getting ready to fly home to Michigan. When the attack happened, I tried to call my wife, but all I got were “circuits are busy” recordings. She worked in an office building in downtown Detroit at the time. The frustration of not knowing if she was alright still haunts me.

Stephen's wife Karen believes that her husband tried to call her at 9 a.m. "The phone rang, but when I got to the phone, no one was there," she said. Someone else called, telling her to turn on the television. Then she tried to call her husband at his office and on his cell phone, but got no answer. "He was just always smiling, happy, upbeat, so positive about life," his wife said. "I feel lucky to have loved him for the past 20 years. He gave me two wonderful children. He loved being a dad. That was his favorite job in the world."

I am honored to be able to remember Stephen Cangialosi today. When I get home I will be sure to give my wife a huge hug, kiss her and tell her she is the most important person in my life.

I am lucky to be able to do so.

Remember

2009-09-11T10:08:00.004-04:00

Rep. Joe Wilson and the Emperor's New Clothes

2009-09-10T07:39:00.013-04:00

The internet is all a twitter this morning over Rep. Joe Wilson's lack of respect for the President when he shouted “You Lie” in the midst of a Presidential address. Wilson's outburst was in response to the President's adamant declaration that the proposed health care bill will not cover illegal aliens. This came right after part where the President called-out “certain politicians” (Cough* Sarah Palin *Cough) and THEIR supposed lies.

Maybe what Wilson should have done is grab a few of his colleagues and “booed” the president instead. That, as we see here, is perfectly acceptable.

Blogs like the Huffington Post, The Daily Kos and the Democratic Underground are calling for the censure and removal of Joe Wilson. Maybe Wilson was trying to be more like the European Governments we are often told to emulate. Where were these pundits when an Iraqi reporter threw a shoe at President Bush? It’s apparently O.K. for OTHER people to “disrespect” our President.

From the Daily Kos:

Is the Iraqi reporter eligible for a Pulitzer?

Michael Ware Was Grinning From Ear to Ear! Iraq journalist Michael Ware was shown on CNN telling Blitzer about the shoe throwing incident. He was positively gleeful.

Meanwhile the Huffington Post comments were very similar to those of the Daily Kos:

Find out who it was the guy deserves a medal of honor.

you go Iraqi guy! wooohooo! we should all be chuckin our shoes at him! lmao!!!! the shoebomber! lmao!!!

I would love to throw something at Bush.. not a shoe though.. maybe a brick.. or cinder block.
The next time you see Bush's motorcade rush by, don't let anyone keep you from giving him your shoe, too...

And finally, last but least, we have the input from the loons at the Democratic Underground:

F---ing shame he missed.

Too bad Shrub didn't get his teeth knocked out, that guys a true hero!

*sigh* why can't anyone ever hit their targets? is it asking too much too see Bush hit in the face with a shoe, or Coulter with a pie, or Rove with flaming poo?

I soooooo wish I could throw something at the idiot too.

(Thanks to DummiesFunnies.com for the quotes)

Clearly, Rep. Wilson’s “uncalibrated” timing of his outburst will sidetrack the easily distracted from the real issue at hand: Last month the President said “This is not just about the 47 million Americans who don't have any health insurance at all.” Magically last night, we went down from 47 million uninsured in America to “over” 30 million American “citizens”.

And that was without spending a dime!

Who are these missing 17 odd million uninsured people?

The Department of Homeland Security reported that the number of illegal aliens as of January 2008 was about 12 million.

Imagine that. What's five million give or take when you want to pass your bill...

The Congressional Research Service reported that the current version of the bill would HAVE to cover illegals. Even if this language has now been mysteriously removed, we know the United States Supreme Court has ruled that prohibiting illegals from public education is unconstitutional:

In Plyler v. Doe, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that Texas law violated the equal protection provisions of the 4th Amendment. As a result of Plyler v. Doe, states may not deny access to public education to immigrant children residing within their boundaries, regardless of their legal status.

The question is, would denying illegal access to PUBLIC HEALTH COVERAGE also be unconstitutional?

If these mystery 17 million are removed now, the public may come to believe that the bill will not cover undocumented workers. Later, when the Supreme Court rules they need to be included, the Obama Administration will still get what they originally intended.

If the Administration is serious about not covering illegals in the health care bill, then why did they not pass the Republican amendment that would have specifically spelled out the prohibition of said coverage?

The House Ways & Means Committee had the opportunity to include language that would have barred illegal aliens from enrolling in the proposed public option or receiving the affordability credits, but chose not to. An amendment offered by Rep. Dean Heller (R-Nev.) would have applied the same eligibility verification procedures for coverage under H.R. 3200 that have been used for years to prove eligibility for Medicaid. That amendment was rejected by a party-line vote.

Rep Wilson’s outrage over the “iffyness” of the President’s facts may have left him half blind to his actions when he made his outburst, but in the world of the blind, the one eyed man is king.

If you listen real closely to what Joe Wilson yelled last night, it may not be that he was yelling “You Lie”, what he may have been yelling was “The Emperor Has No Clothes!”

In both cases, he may very well be right.

Mr. T vs Mr. O.

2009-09-08T21:04:00.013-04:00

The President of the United States, a person whom it has been said was too smart for the Presidency, said this yesterday to students across the land:

But at the end of the day, we can have the most dedicated teachers, the most supportive parents, and the best schools in the world - and none of it will matter unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities. Unless you show up to those schools; pay attention to those teachers; listen to your parents, grandparents and other adults; and put in the hard work it takes to succeed.

Back in the 80's a popular television and movie icon said this to students:

Mr. T wins this contest hands down. It's short, to the point, and looks good on a T-shirt.

Besides, it was said more than twenty years ago and I guarantee it is still fondly remembered by many people to this day. As I have been typing this blog entry, I've already forgotten what the President said. There were a few semi-colons or something...

I contemplated watching the President tonight but decided not to. Will he honestly say anything he hasn't already said over the past few months? I doubt it. There is a sense of urgency in this speech. For a party that controls the White House, the Senate and the House, they still can't say if this bill will pass...They could go it alone if they wanted, so why the big speech? Who are they trying to convince? I thought the public was overwhelmingly behind this plan?

We will see tomorrow....

Teach your children well: An alternate lesson plan

2009-09-08T19:30:00.001-04:00

So President Obama spoke to school children at the start of the new School year.

Well, good for him. The speech seemed innocent enough, but what most people were upset about was not the speech (which they only first saw yesterday) but to the lesson plan that teachers were to follow, (which didn't quite line up with what he actually said today) and to the "I Pledge" video that featured Hollywood stars pledging their support to things like not flushing the toilet and their service to the President.

Reagan spoke to a classroom; so did George H. W. Bush. In fact, when Bush, Sr. spoke, the Democrats ordered congressional hearings to get to the bottom of the $27,000 it cost to do so. There is nothing wrong with the leader of the free world addressing students and asking them to "Be Cool, Stay in School".

But this, as someone has said, can be a teachable moment. The real speech you should let your children hear will come Wednesday night, when the President addresses a joint session of Congress, the first non-State of the Union type speech since 9/11.

Let your kids hear what the President has to say, then discuss it with them.

Might I even suggest a few topics for discussion as well:

Explain how it's morally wrong to forcefully take from one group of people to give it to another, no matter your how good your intentions.

Give them a story problem! Little Suzy came to school one day and forgot her lunch money. Without it, she will not be able to eat and will go hungry the rest of the day. Which of these answers is the best way to handle the situation:

1) The Teacher forces your friend Mary to give up her lunch because Mary's mom and dad have a bigger house, better job, a bigger car and can afford to make Mary a real lunch. Her dinner will probably be better than Suzy's dinner so in the end its O.K.

2) All of the students take a vote and decide that Bobby should give up $1.00 of his lunch money because Bobby always brings $1.00 more each day for the cafeteria and it's not fair.

3) Suzy beats up Bobby on the playground and takes his lunch money.

4) The teacher asks each student to make a donation to help Suzy out.

5) The principle decides that all students, even those that bring their own lunches, must buy from the school cafeteria, that way the school can make sure all the students get the same lunch.

Ask them to write a book report on a 1,000 page novel they never read. If your child objects that you can't really know about the book unless you read it, explain to them this is exactly what Congressmen do with 1,000 page bills.

At anytime during the speech, if your child disagrees with anything the President says, call them a racist. Explain that is how political discourse is handled these days.

And when its all over with, ask them to write letters to themselves how they can pledge their service to the ~~President~~ Country.

Musings on Michigan

2009-09-03T15:12:00.009-04:00

I really miss reading Bob Talbert in the Free Press. Bob had a great love for everything Michigan. While he was mostly optimistic about much of the things that go on in this state, he was also very subtle in his criticisms, a skill I need to learn. You too?

Bon Appétit's September issue ranks Detroit's own Faygo Root Beer No. 1 in a tasting of at least six brands from around the country. The magazine describes it as "dry and crisp, with a frothy head, a good bite and a long finish." (Go on...say it....)

While Faygo is owned by an out-of-state corporation, it’s still nice to see a uniquely Detroit brand get noticed. Since I had my heart valve surgery, I’ve had to give up drinking beer and cut my caffeine content down. (I’m still working on the caffeine thing). As a result, I’ve taken a big liking to root beer. The sugar used most of the time comes from cane sugar and it’s typically caffeine free. Drinking it out of a glass bottle always tastes much better than plastic. Now I hear bars are starting to get a lot of requests for the different varieties.

Staycations are all the rage in news reports. Not like it’s really a new thing. I know many family members and friends that have been enjoying the wonders of Michigan all of their lives. My family in particular has been doing this for 50 years…AT THE SAME LAKE. The Pure Michigan spots are wonderful; however, there is only one spot that mentions “Gone Fishing” and nothing that touts the great hunting and fishing in this state. There is even a spot for the CASINOS. Maybe they just haven't gotten around to it yet...

Flying Carp are inching their way closer to Lake Michigan. An electric weir is all that is holding this invasive species from the Great Lakes. What happens if there is a serious power outage? And tell me why again there isn’t an open season on these fish? In the words of the Emperor: Wipe them out...all of them.

Nice seeing eagles flying in the air. It’s become something I expect each year when I head up to the lake we frequent. There is an over abundance of trout in streams, ducks in the air, deer in the fields and walleye in the lakes. Next time you see someone with a Ducks Unlimited or Trout Unlimited sticker on their vehicle, or someone buying a fishing or hunting license... thank them. Their contributions to conservation clubs and programs helped make this possible. The Michigan Wild Turkey Federation nearly single handily snatched the wild turkeys from the brink of extinction here in Michigan.

It’s exciting to see all the fired up citizens at these local town hall meetings. There is the old saying, “If you are not angry, you aren’t paying attention”. But enough with the Nazi rhetoric from both sides, O.K.? Call someone a Federalist or even a Socialist for all I care, but to compare anyone to Hitler or a brown shirt is just forcing people to ignore your message. That and biting the finger off of someone you disagree with. Seriously...

Fall is in the air. I know it’s hard to accept for some of you, but it is. I’m never that comfortable in shorts anyway, I prefer a good pair of Levi jeans any day. I seriously LOVE Fall: Fall fishing, Fall hunting, the Franklin Cider Mill, the shade of yellow the sun casts on buildings, trees and water-filled clouds at dusk. Alas it's way too short. Not living out in the country anymore I miss the smell of burning leaves.

Got a Michigan Musing? Send it to HipposAss@gmail.com Don't forget to Reddit or Digg anything you like here and help spread the word about the blog. If you promise to keep visiting, I'll promise to keep writing.

Connecticut Politicians Play Solitaire While Raising Taxes

2009-09-01T11:16:00.006-04:00

It’s shortly before 2:30 am in the morning. Your state doesn’t have a budget in place yet. Your state Senate is debating on whether or not to raise taxes on one group of people to support more social programs for another group of people.

What do you do if you are an elected politician?

You play solitaire.

If I was caught playing solitaire at my desk by my boss and not doing my job, there would be repercussions. I don't know if these two are Republicans or Democrats, but maybe they forget who they work for...

This is noteworthy from the article:

Sen. Dan Debicella, a Shelton Republican who serves as the ranking Senate Republican on the budget committee, said the Democratic bill creates an over reliance on 27,000 very wealthy families. If 2,000 of those families moved out of the state, it would be "devastating'' for the state budget, he said.

The problem with raising taxes is that you eventually run out of people to tax. Should any of these people "Go Galt", then Connecticut will have to raise taxes on a new group of people....

Magic Poop Collector

2009-08-30T20:09:00.009-04:00

Now that I have your attention....

Detroit Mayor Dave Bing was on WJR this morning. He reported that on Saturday, fifty bus drivers called in sick. Mayor Bing has been contemplating cutting bus service in Detroit to save money. Detroit may be weeks away from declaring bankruptcy. Bing noted that even with the drivers calling in sick, they were still able to operate the buses efficiently. Guess he now knows who needs to be laid off, huh?

Simply unbelievable...Don't try this at home.

Democrat Charles Rangel Chairman of the tax-writing Ways and Means Committee "misreported" his claimed income the past few years by as much as $780,000. I know I'm pretty excited when I find a dollar in my jeans, Rep Rangel must have been overjoyed!

Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Property

If you are like me, having your own little corner of green earth to call your home is just about the best feeling in the world. Owning your own piece of land is a dream many of us share. If you don't, then that's OK as well. To each their own.
But the Washington Examiner has an article about a new Government funded study that shows the evils of the "One House, One Property" dream:

DRIVING AND THE BUILT ENVIRONMENT: THE EFFECTS OF COMPACT DEVELOPMENT ON MOTORIZED TRAVEL, ENERGY USE, AND CO2 EMISSIONS.

The Washington Examiner writes:

Why would living in "denser environments" be better? Well, for you and your family, it wouldn't be, but it would be for Smart Growth progressives in and out of government because it would be so much easier for them to control how you and your family live.

Why? Well, just to take the first example that comes to mind: Instead of relying upon a private car that can take you wherever you decide to go, you will have to use government-owned mass transit that only takes you where the government thinks you should be able to go.

And without independent mobility, you won't have nearly as much freedom to do things, like send your kids to a school you prefer instead of the government school closest to your high rise.

Also, you probably will have to get a job working at one of those massive bureaucratic institutions that thrive in the close-in urban sky scraper environment. So your future economic opportunities will be much more limited than they are now

You knew it was coming, right?

No War for Neodymium

The Prius is hyped as the answer to America's "Addiction to Oil" and will probably single handily save the Earth or something. Turns out while you were going cold turkey on the oil, you became addicted to rare earth metals. The addiction has gotten so bad, they expect a shortage. Nice. But the Prius makes you feel better so everything is OK, right? It will fit into the small parking space you will be allotted in the new urban centers of living, but make sure you pay your taxes unlike Rep. Charles Rangel, because for the rest of us, there are consequences.

And don't forget to pick up your dog poop.

Frost Warning

2009-08-30T19:26:00.006-04:00

No, not THAT Frost, this frost:

Issued by The National Weather Service
Alpena/Gaylord, MI
3:57 pm EDT, Sun., Aug. 30, 2009
A FROST ADVISORY REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM 2 AM TO 8 AM EDT MONDAY.
TEMPERATURES WILL FALL TO BETWEEN 30 AND 35 DEGREES LATE TONIGHT... LEADING TO AREAS OF FROST.
PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS...
TAKE ACTION NOW TO PROTECT TENDER AND YOUNG VEGETATION. IF POSSIBLE... MOVE PLANTS INDOORS. OUTDOOR PLANTS SHOULD BE PROTECTED WITH STRAW, BLANKETS OR PLASTIC SHEETS.
... AREAS OF FROST LATE TONIGHT IN THE INTERIOR OF NORTHERN LOWER MICHIGAN...

AL? Al? What does it mean Al?

"Yeah...about that Global Warming thing.."

The strongest and most effective force in guaranteeing the long-term maintenance of power is not violence in all the forms deployed by the dominant to control the dominated, but consent in all the forms in which the dominated acquiesce in their own domination.

Robert Frost

It Ain't (America) No More, OK?

2009-08-29T07:35:00.010-04:00

Incredible YouTube video.

According to the person who taped this:

This video was taken on Tuesday, August 25th, 2009 at Rep. Jim Moran's (D-VA) Town Hall meeting on Obama Deathcare (Howie Dean was there too) held at South Lakes High School in Reston, VA.

Many people were left outside when the school filled to capacity. School security officer Wesley Cheeks, Jr. did not the protester's anti-Obamacare poster which used one of the gone-viral "Joker" graphics.

When he said to Officer Cheeks, "This used to be America!" his response was: "It ain't no more, OK?"

I keep my FlipIt camera handy all the time now. The incredible images coming from these Town Halls and the arrogance of those in power is simply astonishing. We have elected leaders dismissing upset citizens as racist and astroturfers, Union Thugs intimidating protesters and we have incidents that are not being reported on Cable News, or being edited to distort the issue.

Luckily you have The Hippo's Ass scouring the internet so you don't have to.

The End of the Week Round-up: Kennedy, A Rejected Commercial, Real Grassroots and All You Can Eat Pancakes.

2009-08-28T16:53:00.022-04:00

It’s Friday!

Time for our weekly dumping of news you may have overlooked this week. While the rest of the media was covering the death of Senator Ted Kennedy, there were several other news items that may have escaped your attention. As we wait to see if Washington takes a Friday News Dump, lets proceed with the roundup, shall we?

A little over a month ago, ABC News was happy to broadcast a one-sided, one hour infomercial on Health Care starring President Obama. No opposing viewpoints were going to be heard since ABC said they promised to be fair. This same network now refuses to broadcast ads from a group opposing the massive government bill on health care.

"The ABC Television Network has a long-standing policy that we do not sell time for advertising that presents a partisan position on a controversial public issue,” spokeswoman Susan Sewell said in a written statement. “Just to be clear,this is a policy for the entire network, not just ABC News.”

So in the interest of fairness, we present to you here the ad, no charge at all to the League of American Voters. (Next time, people, you gotta pay!) . Watch it, judge for yourself and should you feel the need, pass it along to others who might be interested.

I have a small kitchen…a very small kitchen. So small in fact that a loaf of bread takes up half the counter space. But if I had one of those large kitchens you see on The Real Housewives of Orange County (my wife watches it...not me. Really!) then I might just be tempted to pick up this little beauty. The Chefstack! It produces 200 pancakes per hour. I’d like to see your Prius do that! Actually, I’d like to see any car do that.

I just had to post this. It comes to us via Newsbusters. How are people reacting to the death of Senator Kennedy on Martha’s Vineyard? Here is Huffington Post blogger, Matt Cooper's reaction to the scene:

Yeah, that was exactly how I felt the morning of 9/11: Melancholy, but trying to enjoy the achingly beautiful day. Why just the other day, when my boat wouldn't start, I said to myself, “Gee, it’s a wonderful day to be out on the water, but I am stuck at home and it makes me feel like when I heard about Katrina hitting New Orleans". You too?

The protesters at the Town Hall meetings have been called everything from thugs to racists to shills of the insurance companies. (NOTE: If true, I’m still waiting for my payment). But the name that burns my gut is Astroturf, implying that our protests are not real, not “grassroots” enough. Over at Pajamas Media they did a little undercover work to see how the Party of the Community Organizer conducts a “grass roots” protest.

And finally, we welcome the DOJ.gov as a viewer of The Hippo’s Ass. That’s right, the Department of Justice has been looking at my blog. I guess they had a lot of time on their hands after dropping the Black Panthers’ Voter Intimidation Investigation or the Bill Richardson Pay-to-Play investigation (It was "killed in Washington.") In a sense, I feel honored: I average 75 viewers a day and the DOJ thinks I warrant watching.

If they are a fan, then welcome, come back often and leave a message, maybe even Digg or Reddit an article. If they are doing this to make me nervous, well, they’ve succeeded.

It does make me nervous.

Funny thing is, I didn’t do anything wrong, yet I’ve had the House.gov, Senate.gov. and now the DOJ.gov looking at my website.

When you start to feel nervous exercising your inalienable rights, then there is something seriously wrong with your government.

Have a nice weekend Department of Justice. The Hippo’s Ass will be watching you, too.

And while you are at it, look up “inalienable”.

Detroit Mugger Critical After Victim Shoots Back; Great Britain Crime Rates Sky Rocket

2009-08-25T20:32:00.016-04:00

Detroit mugger critical after victim with CCW shoots back.

17 year old pulls a gun on a 32 year old man in an armed robbery attempt.
32 year old victim has a MCPL (Michigan Concealed Pistol License) and responds accordingly.
17 year old thug gets the surprise of his life as he ends up critically injured.

This situation happens more than its being reported. If a gunman fires in a restaurant or workplace, its all over the news. When a citizens defends his life by shooting his attacker, the story is either buried or not reported at all. If it is reported, the use of the gun is typically not mentioned. Nice that the Detroit Free Press finally printed a story like this that wasn't slanted toward the criminal being the victim.

Score one for the good guys.

England is typically held up as the example of what a civilized society can do if it enacts strict gun control through the government. We are told that hardly anyone owns a handgun anymore, and while shotguns and rifles are allowed, they are strictly regulated and controlled and are for hunting or sport only.

Now the Daily Mail comes along and tells us that in Great Britain, Gun crime is up by more than half and there are more than 100 serious knife crimes each day, with fatal stabbings having reached the highest level on record. 'The culture of violence that was a feature of U.S. cities a generation ago is now a feature of British cities.'

Those big bad knives...maybe they need strict control over knife ownership as well. Sounds unreasonable? Maybe not... In response to the high rate of crimes committed with knives, the government is now looking at curbing the use of knives. There is even a knife amnesty program:

And this creative PSA lets you "choose your own adventure": Take the knife or don't take the knife. Make a choice and follow through...

Essentially what England has done is disarm its citizens and left them to the mercy of the criminal element. Now they need to educate their citizens about the evils of knife ownership. This has even lead to the invention of a knife that you can't use for stabbing:

Wouldn't it have just been easier to let people have the freedom to defend themselves?

Double Down on KFC's Bread-less Sandwich

2009-08-25T20:05:00.003-04:00

I have to admit I am a bit of a Kentucky Fried Chicken junkie. Something about that original recipe breading makes me drool like one of Pavlov's dogs sitting in church listening to Carol of the Bells. The new grilled KFC isn't half bad, but seriously, what good is KFC without the skin?

Then this Double Down Chicken Sandwich comes along and has me thinking there is something terribly wrong and something oh so right about this. Two fried pieces of KFC, cheese, the Colonel's special sauce and bacon.

From what I hear, PETA is going to be pissed off and this may very well disqualify you for Obamacare. In fact, this may just doom the massive health care bill. When people are truly presented with a choice between higher taxes for health care or the NEW KFC Double Down chicken sandwich...my money is on the Colonel.

Death Panels by Another Name Would Smell the Same (Oregon)

2009-08-24T23:03:00.001-04:00

There has been a lot of talk about whether "Death Panels" are a part of the proposed massive health care bill. Sarah Palin made news by saying:

The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down Syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama’s “death panel” so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their “level of productivity in society,” whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil.

Many main stream news sources went out of their way to rescue President Obama and prove that the massive piece of legislation contained no such thing. The President himself has said it was "offensive" to him to suggest that there were Death Panels.

They were right. Nowhere in the legislation does it state "Death Panel."

But a recent story in the Detroit Free Press reports that Palin wasn't all that far off. According to the Free Press:

President Obama has proposed a new body that would enhance Medicare’s ability to deny care to the elderly and disabled based on government bureaucrats’ arbitrary valuations of those patients’ lives.

Say what?

So if this bill ever passes, what would an arbitrary valuation by a government look like?

Let's look at the state of Oregon, Pajamas Media reports that the Oregon Health Services Commission headquarters have come up with a master list of 503 treatments and conditions their “public option” will cover for its enrollees. They have ranked them in ascending order of priority. Should the state ever run out of money or determine that its budget would not allow for a procedure, then top ranked procedures would get priority.

Toward the bottom of the list in priority:
Emergency appendectomy (prioritized 84th)
Covering injuries to major blood vessels (86th),
Surgery to repair injured internal organs (88),
A “deep wound to the neck”
or open fracture of the larynx or trachea (91),
A ruptured aortic aneurysm (306).

Also of note is the fact that treatments for esophageal, liver, and pancreatic cancers take up priority slots 337 through 339, with treatment for stroke at 340

Samples of higher ranked (more important)maladies are:
Obesity (8)
Depression (9)
Asthma (11)
“Tobacco dependence” (6th)
Reproductive services are 7th
HIV 15
Syphilis is 19

As some of you long time readers remember, I underwent an aortic heart valve replacement last year that required open heart surgery. This ranks 116 on the list. Better than cancer, but way behind syphilis

After this bill is voted upon and passed, the Government then is free to "interpret" the bill and we end up with something that sets a valuation on your life. Why, they could even decide to save a little money based upon you terminal status.

Couldn't happen you say? Vast right wing conspiracy lies?

Here is story of how one woman went up against the Oregon State run health care program:

Essentially, it costs less produce suicide pills than to give a dying patient pills that may extend her life a bit longer. SO the State decided she wasn't important enough to live. Besides, I'm sure the 18 - 35 voter group will be pleased.

So no, Virginia, there is no Death Panel. What there is may be worse.

Garofalo Shows her Softer Side

2009-08-23T09:56:00.008-04:00

Isn't this getting a bit old? Janeane Garofalo uses a barrage of insults to refer to anti-ObamaCare protesters, referring to them as "racists, functionally retarded adults," and "teabaggers." Seems like Janeane is in need of a little bit of attention. My dog, Sam, does this when we don't give her a treat or play with her, or when she needs a walk.

Maybe Janeane needs a walk or a good chew toy.

Well, I'll just let Jack Bauer deal with this one..Jack?

Thank you Jack.

The Daily Prophet Comes Alive

2009-08-22T08:16:00.005-04:00

We were amazed at the creativity of J. K. Rowling when she described the "moving" pictures of the fictional newspaper The Daily Prophet from The Harry Potter Series.

Now in a step towards life imitating art, the moving pictures come to the world of the Muggles.

See the complete story here

I'm still waiting for the Lightsaber. Seriously, I might just Wee Wee my pants should that ever happen. (Is this the proper use of Wee Wee? I'll have to ask our President to be sure.)

Update!

The Obama Administration: Raising the level of Discourse and Intelligence in Politics.

End of the Week Drop: Tort Reform, Clunkers and Selective Editing

2009-08-21T12:20:00.014-04:00

It's Friday!

Politicians will usually use the end of the week, typically around 4:30 p.m. EST, to "drop" a particularly unpopular story to the press. The purpose is that hopefully the American public will be too busy getting ready for their weekend to take notice of the Government's screw-ups. Both parties are masters in this technique. The Sunday morning gab-fests already have their line-ups set, so the story usually gets lost before the Monday morning shows start their week.

Here at The Hippo's Ass, we hope to counter some of the "fog of information" and highlight some things you may have missed this past week.

Tort Reform

Sarah Palin continued to use the popular Facebook to spread her thoughts on current events. Citizen Palin's recent message had to do with Tort Reform:

First, we cannot have health care reform without tort reform. The two are intertwined. For example, one supposed justification for socialized medicine is the high cost of health care. As Dr. Scott Gottlieb recently noted, “If Mr. Obama is serious about lowering costs, he’ll need to reform the economic structures in medicine—especially programs like Medicare.” [1] Two examples of these “economic structures” are high malpractice insurance premiums foisted on physicians (and ultimately passed on to consumers as “high health care costs”) and the billions wasted on defensive medicine.

What does the Washington establishment think about Tort Reform? Let's hear from one of the co-authors of the "popular" Health Care Reform Bill, Congressman John Dingell:

Cash for Clunkers

Over at IHateTheMedia.com, they report on a survey from the National Automobile Dealers Association concerning the Cash for Clunkers Program, which ends on Monday:

NADA surveyed nearly 800 dealers and the results may be the Obama administration’s worst nightmare:

97% of dealers who responded, say the government is not reimbursing fast enough
13% of dealers have dropped out the program because the government is not reimbursing fast enough and overall concern payment problems
87% percent of dealers are concerned the money will be exhausted
3% of CARS program deals have been reimbursed
66% of dealers have not received one payment from the government
25% of dealers are experiencing servere cash flow problems that require short-term loans to fix
11% of submitted applications have been approved (though dealers still are waiting for the money)
16% of submitted applications have been rejected
55% of dealers are not confident they will get reimbursed for every deal

Here is a fun game to play:

Substitute the word Hospital/Doctors for the word Dealer/Dealers
Substitute AMA for NADA
Substitute Health Care Reform Program for CARS

Who Watches MSNBC Anyway?

Here is an item from Newsbusters.com:

On Tuesday, MSNBC’s Contessa Brewer fretted over health care reform protesters legally carrying guns: "A man at a pro-health care reform rally...wore a semiautomatic assault rifle on his shoulder and a pistol on his hip....there are questions about whether this has racial overtones....white people showing up with guns." Brewer failed to mention the man she described was African American.

Seriously, does anyone watch this news channel? Regardless, people are demanding that heads roll: Click Here for more to the story.

And finally, The Blue Hippo Fantasy Football League picked their draft date this year, Sept 9th. The League celebrates 11 years of Fantasy Football. The Editor of The Hippo's Ass finished 12th out of 12 teams last year and is hoping for a rebuilding season. In the spirit of Obamanomics, he will be asking to install a rule this year that will take one player from a "good" team and give it to a team that is playing poorly.

Its not that we want to punish them, its just that we want to spread their success around.

UPDATE! The dropped arrived right on schedule.

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The Obama administration will raise its 10-year budget deficit projection to approximately $9 trillion from $7.108 trillion in a report next week, a senior administration official told Reuters on Friday.

Shining a Light on Evil Fishing

2009-08-19T17:15:00.008-04:00

In an effort to help save many of the lighthouses across the country, the federal government is encouraging non-profit organizations to apply to help pick up the cost of preservation. The non-profit would then be responsible for the upkeep and running of the historic light houses. See here for a link to the full story.

Excellent idea! One can see the non-profits educating the public about maritime shipping history, the use of light-houses before GPS, the local impact a light-house would have on a community and the unique architecture of these vanishing landmarks.

One group has already applied: PETA. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals wants to turn the Grand Haven Lighthouse, in Michigan, into its headquarters to educate the public about the evils of fishing and eating fish.

"We want to renovate the Grand Haven lights as a memorial to the billions of fish killed annually by sport fishermen, as well as for their flesh (commercial fishing industry)," said Lindsey Rajt, manager of PETA's campaigns department. "We also want to make it a fun and educational place."

Signs would likely announce the lighthouse as home of PETA's Fish Empathy Center.

Because... memorials to the eating of flesh are always fun and educational. Maybe when you take your kids to the PETA Fish Flesh Memorial, they will recieve a free comic book published by the non-profit:

Let me shine some light on the “EVIL” fishing (and hunting) industry in Michigan:

Sportsmen (and women) spend $3.4 BILLION each year in Michigan.

It supports 46,000 Jobs; $1.7 Billion in Salaries

Provides $278 million in state and local tax revenue

Has a $5.9 Billion ripple effect on the economy.

There are 1.07 million anglers in Michigan.

Anglers spend $2 billion alone.

Sportsmen support more jobs than the University of Michigan in the Peoples Republic of Ann Arbor.

And this is just the sport fishing industry, commercial fishing adds even more.

How exactly does PETA support the economy? They don’t. They destroy it.

That’s the whole point.

Your Tax Dollars at Work (Part 2)

2009-08-18T19:33:00.006-04:00

The Good News: President Obama has decided to invest your tax dollars to finance the exploration of new oil fields off shore, a major boon for an oil company that could lead to copious amounts oil and help alleviate a supposed coming energy crisis and reduce our national dependence on foreign oil.

Oh wait..did I say "our"?

The Wall Street Journal reports that President Obama has changed his mind about drilling off shore for oil. Good news...if you are a South American. A $2 billion investment.

But wait, there's more!

Hot Air reports that the Brazilian Oil Company which is the recipient of your $2 Billion loan has a major investor. Wonder if you can guess who that is?

Hot Air writes:

Is it a coincidence that Obama backer George Soros repositioned himself in Petrobras to get dividends just a few days before Obama committed $2 billion in loans and guarantees for Petrobras’ offshore operations? Hmmmmmmmmmm.

Putting America First..If you live in South America. While you are going see your taxes and product prices increase due to Cap and Trade, Brazil will reap the benefits of your hard earned tax money. Wouldn't it be nice to KEEP your tax money here where it will benefit YOU?

Your Tax Dollars at Work

2009-08-17T17:35:00.007-04:00

Residents in Berrien County, Michigan are questioning the county's proposed replacement of a bridge. The bridge is estimated to cost $600,000...paid for through tax dollars. The bridge would replace a short, 85-year-old span that crosses a creek in Berrien County's Pipestone Township.

The county road commission recommended in April that the bridge be replaced.

So what's the problem? This is supposedly what "government" is for, to replace crumbling infrastructure.

It gets better.

Seems that the bridge is on a dead end road that serves a farm field.

Still...the county has a responsibility to maintain access even though the bridge basically serves only a farm field, right?

Wait for it...wait for it......

The Herald-Palladium of St. Joseph says part of the problem residents have is that township Supervisor Hazen Harner owns the land that would become inaccessible without the bridge.

One Man
An Elected Official of the Township
$600,000
For a bridge to his property
Paid for by Taxpayers

But don't worry...Harner says the road commission always overestimates the cost of such projects and believes it can be built for less.

Well, at least he can sleep at night.

Fishing was fine...Catching sucked

2009-08-16T21:30:00.009-04:00

I'm back from vacation and trying to catch up is always a pain. The grass needs cutting and watering and there is a small tree in my back yard where there wasn't one before. (I wasn't gone THAT long). We arrived home to find a few spiders squatting in the windows. Plus the cat is mad.

My work email had more than 100 messages. Luckily none were unsolicited messages from the White House. (Are things that tough that the White House is resorting to spamming?)

I already miss vacation: the lapping of the waves against the side of the boat, the call of the loon on a foggy August morning, the silent flight of the Eagle as it circles the lake and dives to catch his breakfast, that NO SIGNAL response from my iPhone even when standing on the roof of the boat house, that simple pleasure of having enough time to read 1-1/2 books (Alas, Babylon and Death Mask) while the fishing pole is perched lazily in the crevice next to your big toe as you drift slowly across the lake at sunset. And of course seeing my wife get up on water skis for the first time.

We spent the week about 45 minutes north of Standish, Michigan. You may have heard that Standish is offering to take the terrorist prisoners from Gitmo. The Standish Correctional Facility is scheduled to close and 300 people will lose their jobs, but Governor Jenny "not in my back yard" Granholm is not being a good party member and said she would rather take California prisoners. She has no problem taking Canadian trash though.

The video I took of Congressman John Dingell telling a very irate crowd that there is only so much Congress can do about Tort Reform (a major reason why health costs are so high) gathered almost 10,000 hits. Not quite the doped-up kid coming from the dentist level, but for this little blogger, it's my personal 15 minutes of fame. Too bad they didn't link to my blog and helped drive traffic here (which you can do by the way).

As I wrote earlier, someone from house.gov has been reading The Hippo's Ass (which is more than I can say for some of my friends); now I find out that I've had some hits from Senate.gov has as well. I wonder if anyone reported me to Flag@whitehouse.gov?

Oh..and my mother, who is in her sixties, works part-time, lives pay check to pay check and has to go to AARP to get a discount on the preparation of her taxes (which she pays every year unlike some people in the new administration) is getting audited by the Federal Government.

...just a coincidence right?

The government water project here in Dearborn that is over budget and behind schedule is having additional problems. Who didn't see THAT one coming? Speaker Pelosi is upset over the depiction of the President as Hitler saying that town hall protesters are taking the Nazi imagery too far..

Can't quite figure out what she is talking about, seems like dehumanizing your opposition is SOP for radicals and dissenters....I saw this one just last night on season one of True Blood:

All Animals are equal; Some Animals are more equal than others.

Meanwhile, I have till September 3rd to decide who I want to draft in my Fantasy Football league. Last year I came in dead last. Maybe I should draft Michael Vick? And why the heck is Buffalo Wild Wings called BW3? Where is the missing W?

Oh..and there is this ditty from our friends in Canada. Canada's Top Doc says their Government Health Care isn't doing so well. Who didn't see THAT one coming? Shh....don't tell Michael Moore.

Right now the boat is parked in the driveway, the fishing poles are put away, the luggage is unpacked and our last bit of food splurging is completed; back to the Wii Active routine this week. The cat isn't mad anymore; amazing what a little Friskies Deluxe will do. Meanwhile, post offices may close on Saturdays, a sugar shortfall will cause the price of ethanol to rise, and Fake Doctors are infiltrating town halls in support of Government Run Health Care.

Is it time for a vacation yet?

I Always Feel Like...Somebody's Watching Me!

2009-08-07T12:14:00.007-04:00

Well I am off for a while; going fishing. The Hippos Ass will return in about a week. Till then talk amongst yourselves. Feel free to leave a comment, visit my links for some interesting point of views and spread the word to your family and friends. If you have something interesting you'd like to see posted, drop me a line.

Oh.. and to the person or persons from www.house.gov who spent all of 18 minutes this morning at 10:30am viewing my blog, I hope you got the message. I see the Government is busy keeping track of its dissenters. Glad to now know we are being watched...

But know that we are watching you, too.

Ain't Democracy grand?

Got complaints? Email them directly to Flag@whitehouse.gov. Make sure you include the web address.

...with Liberty and Justice for all.

Congressman Dingell Gets An Earfull

2009-08-06T22:09:00.004-04:00

Well, it turns out more people knew about Congressman John Dingell's Town Hall Meeting on Health Care that I thought. Nearly 600 people showed up to protest against the bill he co-authored. Strange really, because the event was never publicized. They heard through word of mouth. How is THAT for organizing huh?

The meeting was so packed they had to hold TWO of them. I was lucky enough to get into the second one and took this video. I'll write more later, but as you can see from these videos, Congressman Dingell's constituents are not a bunch of happy campers.

Oh..and by the way, these people were PISSED that the liberal blogs and media were refering to them as shills or paid operatives of the insurance companies. These are everyday people who are fed up with the way Government is treating them.

I was expecting a bigger turnout from the Ann Arbor crowd. Starbucks must have been giving away free WiFi or something. The Audience WAS stacked by the way, the front rows were mostly made up of Dingell supporters. Funny how many of them were never outside waiting in line like the rest of us peasants. There were numerous policemen, ambulances and only one News Station came to cover the event. The only person they appeared to tape was the one lone Lyndon LaRouche supporter holding an Obama as Hitler sign.

Debbie Dingell tried to talk to the crowd but looked very overwhelmed at the size of the crowd. Things are always a big strange outside the bubble they live in.

I think, after all was said and done, Congressman Dingell got the point that his voters were not happy. Fat lot of good it will do. As Congressman Dingell said at one point, when referring to his constituents, "you just don't know". Typical politician, thinking its up to them to edumacate us backwoods hicks who don't know any better when Government wants to take over our lives.

I have news for you, Mr. Dingell. We know. We know all too well.

Double Secret Town Hall Meeting

2009-08-05T11:03:00.012-04:00

I find this pretty interesting.

Congressman John Dingell is holding a Town Hall on Health Care, tonight in Romulus Michigan. Dingell represents the 15th Congressional District where I make my home and pay my taxes.

Health Care is the single biggest issue on the minds of Americans (we are told) so having my elected representative hear from his constituents must be a good thing.

The funny thing is I didn’t hear a word about it until yesterday.

I checked my email inbox to see if I missed reading the Congressman Dingell’s newsletter. Even though I didn’t vote for him, I still subscribe to the newsletter just to keep up on how he is representing me. There was nothing there. Maybe he found out I’m a libertarian and deleted me from his email list.

Then I went straight to the source: John Dingell’s Congressional Web site. After an exhaustive search on the site, I couldn’t find one reference to a scheduled Town Hall Meeting in Romulus. Google has a nice advanced search engine where you can search whole domains. After a little more double checking, still nothing.

It was time to do a little internet surfing.

http://www.rightmichigan.com/ had an action alert. This is obviously a conservative web site so I doubt Congressman Dingell would promote his meeting there. The Tea Party of Western Michigan also had a notice. The Michigan Liberal's web site had their own alert, claiming that right wing operatives were planning to disrupt the meeting. They referenced a Facebook group that has all of three members.

The The Ann Arbor Chronicle had a notice. Ok, that’s one. We all know which way the Peoples Republic of Ann Arbor leans. Surely Congressman Dingell would have promoted this very important meeting more, to get as many diverse opinions as possible. I checked the two major newspapers in Detroit, the Detroit News and the Detroit Free Press. Neither one had a notice.

How can this be? The majority of Americans (or at least people living in the States) support a Government controlled health care system (so we are told). So why be secretive about a town hall meeting? Only one public notice about the event? Dingell is a co-author of the darn bill! Could it be Congressman Dingell is a little apprehensive after seeing how common everyday citizens are standing up across this country to voice their concerns over a growing government and socialized health care? Nah…

I will be at the event tonight. Judging from the lack of advanced notice this Town Hall on Health Care had, I expect a very low turn out. Still I have to wonder, if there are people there, who will they be and who invited them?

UPDATE!

Just as I was posting this, there was FINALLY an article on the The Detroit Free Press . Here is the kicker...they called out the cops. Three uniformed officers will be on hand. Liberal blogs have been bemoaning the uprising of citizens in response to their dear leaders Health Care Plan asking why we can't have a civil discussion about it. Here is an example of their idea of civil discussion:

Or maybe this?

Barbara Boxer called the citizens too well dressed to be sincere. Some are calling them Brooks Brothers mobs. These people are so out of touch its not even funny. People are upset that both Democrats AND Republicans are running amok in Washington. When liberals protest Iraq or a sitting President, it's called Grassroots. When common everyday people get fed up with politicians and their obsence spending, its called Astroturf and is dismissed. Linda Douglass, Communications Director for the White House’s Health Reform Office just this week asked all citizens to report any “fishy” talk, emails or websites to the White House so they can investigate any “disinformation” about healthcare.

I'll be there tonight (in my Brooks Brothers shirt and pants) and let you know more tomorrow. Then its off on vacation for me.

Oh..and I'll save you some time: here is the website where you can report me flag@whitehouse.gov. Have at it.

Tin Foil Hat Alert

2009-08-04T16:28:00.010-04:00

I like a good conspiracy theory. There is something about the scope and scale of these theories that get the old adrenaline running in the What-IF? gland of the brain. I even have a subscription to Coast-to-Coast AM so I can download their recent radio program to my iPod and listen anytime I want. Fake moon landing? Roswell cover-up? New World Order? All of it makes for some real good entertainment.

Conspiracy theories have been around since forever. Caveman Grog once thought that the tree on the outskirts of his village was conspiring to take away his fire by waving its branches and creating wind to blow the fire out.

In more recent times, theories have become ingrained in our culture and nearly accepted as fact by many people. Did you know that 25 percent of young adults aged 18 -29 do not believe that we landed on the moon? (I’d like to see who they voted for in the last election…) It’s hard today to find someone who believes that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. Conspiracies are fun; just look at the X-Files, or the Da Vinci Code.

But some can be down outright annoying, like Global Warming.

During the Bush Administration, the wacky left floated the idea that 9/11 was an inside job, a false flag operation conducted by a shadow government controlled by Dick Cheney and the BigOil companies. Concrete and steel can not be melted and destroyed by massive amounts of fuel. (See here for a smaller version of what can happen when fuel, concrete and metal combine in a fireball).

Now under the Obama Administration, there is another conspiracy theory floating around, gaining ground with every day that passes. Birthers, people who don’t believe that President Obama is a U.S. Citizen, have emerged from the right of the political spectrum as the heir apparent to the 9/11 Truthers. They have compiled lists of data and coincidences that they say is proof that President Obama was not born in Hawaii, but actually in Kenya.

I can’t say it’s not intriguing. How can it not be? Conspiracy theories are fun because should they happen to BE TRUE, the consequences are always so earth shattering that it would cause an upheaval in society that it would literally change everyone's lives, even if only for a short period of time. A government that would kill 3,000 of its own citizens? The hding of Space Aliens in Area 51? The Walrus was NOT Paul? Earth shattering indeed.

While conspiracy theories surrounding President Obama's birth are amusing, they are distracting. We have an administration that is on the verge of passing one of the largest government social programs in the history of this country. We have a government that is so out of control in spending that future generations will need to be socialists just to write off the debt. We have a minority party that can't live up to moral standards it set for itself. We have a Congress that is rushing massive bills to vote without properly reading them. We have two political parties that live so outside the bubble of everyday life, they continue to alienate their very own constituencies to the point where voters are rising up and openly calling out their elected representatives. And we have a fawning media that tingles with excitement at the President’s every word.

I am not saying that upholding the citizenship clause of the Constitution is not important, but let’s keep focused here. Not even a quarter of the stimulas money has been spent, yet the administration is already taking credit for "saving the economy". We all know, only Government can save us. We can't do this on our own. /sarcasm

All the President has to do is show the original copy of his birth certificate, the same one being held under lock and key in a vault in Hawaii and the matter is over and done with. The Birthers will be humiliated, the GOP will further sink into disarray and the Democrats will lock-up a victory in the mid-term elections.

Unless there IS something to this whole birth certificate thing….then all bets are off and hang on.

All Obama, All the Time

2009-07-30T11:01:00.016-04:00

The Federal Government Introduces the Media Stimulus Plan.

Call it what you will, but it does seem like the guy is on TV, or the radio, or in the print media every time you turn around. Time Magazine is featuring President Obama on its cover for the 12th time in 12 months. The media darling even made an appearance on the George Lopez show the other night.

All this apparently led to this interesting situation: Woman Sells TV. Reason? Obama is on all the time

For what it's worth, here is my two cents: My wife and I went to the movies the other night to see the new Harry Potter film The Half Blood Prince (one of my favorites of the whole movie series). Before the movie, before the previews, during that new section where they play five minutes of advertising, there was some montage of Michigan scenes with a song that was telling us to hang tough or something. Pictures of Kid Rock, the Joe Lewis Fist, Gov. Jenny Granholm....and President Obama.

Seriously?

Apparently I can't even go see Harry Potter without images of our dear leader flashing before my eyes. (Don't get me started on Gov. Granholm, I just ate lunch.) News items are one thing, promotion is another. Go on Facebook or other websites and you are bombarded with ads telling you that President Obama wants mothers to go back to school! President Obama wants to give you a free stimulus check! President Obama wants you to buy the ShamWOW! Madison Avenue (or some obscure city street in Beijing) knows the power of an image in marketing products or ideas.

But do you want your current federal officials to be just 8 x 10 glossy media campaigns? I don't want them to be rock or movie stars. I want them to do their job in upholding the Constitution, representing their constituents and defending the Republic. Our elected officials should not be a member in good standing of the cult of personality.

At least wait till they leave office. I'm still waiting patiently for my Bill Clinton SAX statue.

Michigan Congressman Shirks Job Responsibilities

2009-07-29T12:00:00.011-04:00

Congressman John Conyers and his lovely wife, Inmate 9865-34

John Conyers (D-Mich), Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee spoke at a National Press Club luncheon and pondered the question; why should members of Congress have to read these bills anyway.

"What good is reading the bill if it's a thousand pages and you don't have two days and two lawyers to find out what it means after you read the bill?"

He’s talking about the massive 1,000 page Health Care Bill that President Obama wants to ram through Congress. Even though the bill is obese and unreadable, Rep. Conyers is still going to vote for it anyway.

Have we all forgotten the meaning of a representative form of government? These politicians we elect are in fact supposed to read these bills, understand them, and vote in the best interest of their constituency and the Republic, namely you and I. Imagine if we held a public referendum on each and every bill that came through Congress.

But for Congressman John Conyers, doing this is just too much work. Instead, let’s just come up with a hair brained idea that sounds good: Universal or Free Health Care. Now lets market it to the people by saying it’s for their own good and it won’t cost them a penny (maybe), but it will save you money later (just ignore what the Congressional Budget Office says). Never mind what is actually IN THE BILL, let’s only vote on whether or not it SOUNDS good.

Even though, through Rep. Conyers’ own admission, the bill is so overwritten that one can not reasonably comprehend it, he’s going to vote for it anyway…because it looks good. This should frighten you. Here is a link to the actual bill: FREE Health Care! (Can't figure out the bill? Here is a picture that should help)

This isn’t the first time Rep. Conyers has made this statement. He made a similar proclamation some years back when a newsman asked him if he actually read a bill before signing it. Basically he said then that if Congress took the time to read every bill that came across their desks, they would never get anything done.

That’s not really a bad thing, John.

It’s not like he doesn’t have time on his hands. This is a guy who dropped an ACORN probe (claimed it came from the “powers that be”) coincidentally as his Detroit Council woman wife’s lawyers began the process of negotiating on criminal charges for bribery. (She is going to Jail by the way…maybe). This is the guy who has so much faith in the government public system he sends his children off to a private school 20 minutes north of Detroit.

Rep. Conyers’ statement proves a couple of things. 1) Both parties in Congress have no idea what they are voting on. They only care about the two or three lines added on to the bill that will line the pockets of their special interest groups and help them get re-elected, 2) Government has gotten so large that it has bogged down Congress with its complexities, leading our elected representatives to only vote for the COVER of the Bill and 3) We the People must demand more from our elected representatives.

I have only one question for Congressman Conyers; If this health care bill is so fantastic, will he sign himself and his family to the same plan he is forcing on the rest of his constituents?

“I cannot undertake to lay my finger
on that article of the Constitution
which granted a right to Congress of expending,
on the objects of benevolence,
the money of their constituents.”

James Madison

US Soldier Demands Apology From Senator McCaskill

2009-07-29T09:40:00.004-04:00

This is the great thing about the internet. While the major players in Washington all say that the majority of Americans back a Universal Health Care Bill, the citizens on the front lines continue to prove them wrong. Here is yet ANOTHER example of citizens standing up and giving it back to the elected officials who are about as clueless as a slug.

At a recent "Town Hall" on Health Care, a Marine explains to Sen. Claire McCaskill what the Constitution means.

Requiem for a Boat

2009-07-28T13:05:00.009-04:00

The Glassmaster is no more.

After nearly four years of repairs, renovations and really good fishing trips, my Glassmaster boat gave up her last breath this weekend in a cloud of burning fuel exhaust.

The day we bought her off Craig's List, the starter burned out on her maiden voyage and we nearly went floating aimlessly down from Wyandotte to Niagara Falls. Now, the circle is complete with the starter once again failing to get the old girl running.

You'll always remember your first...boat. We had some great times together.

In the Summer, she provided days upon days of fun up on Clear Lake. She came with us on a couple of our men's Fall fishing trips; in fact she held 6 guys while floating on Houghton Lake in the dark. There was the time she made the Wyandotte-Detroit Run in 12 parsecs. I even caught my first river Walleye on her while fishing the Trenton Channel.

On a clear day when the waters are calm she could really let loose, topping off at 30 miles per hour. And it's amazing how she made me smile while flipping a big fat finger at Al Gore every time she started up, the cloud of grey exhaust fumes wafting aimlessly into the sky, doing her part to counter the recent drop in global temperatures.

I learned a thing or two about boats from her; like how to pull a prop, replace a starter, install a new throttle, rewire lights, install carpeting and new seats, fix a steering column, what "blown gasket" means, repair a stripped gear, etc. The Johnson Outboard Repair Manual became my bible.

As I faced the task of pouring more money into her, I realized that it was time to move on. We are now in the process of buying a newer boat.

But as I was cleaning her up last night, getting ready to place her back on Craig's List, I hit the ignition for old time's sake.....she stalled, then coughed and the starter turned over. That's my girl...she refuses to quit. But it's too late for me. Rest easy now little boat, safer harbors are ahead.

I'm sure there is someone out there looking for a 1969 Glassmaster with a 55 HP Johnson. She comes loaded: a fish finder, marine radio and a well marked up repair manual.

The memories, I'll keep.

Pay No Attention to the Man Behind the Curtain

2009-07-23T10:25:00.016-04:00

When I was younger, I wanted to be a magician, but I never had the patience for the practice nor the eye-hand coordination. I blame my stubby Polish fingers.

But I did enjoy learning the tricks and watching magicians. I knew enough to not be distracted by the shiny coin, because the other hand held the secret. If the Magician created a flash of fire on his right side...I looked toward the left. If the knife was pointing out the front, I looked toward the back. Where there was smoke, there were mirrors.

Wednesday's Presidential Press Conference was one big shiny coin. To his credit, the Obamagician made it work. Concerning the arrest of Professor Gates, I am just like the President of the United States: I wasn't there and I don't have all the facts. Unlike the President, I'm going to hold off on my opinion of that until I do.

I do know when we are being misdirected, though.

The President's Health Care Plan (ObamaCare (tm)) is not doing so well. And what does a politician do when things aren't going their way? They pull out the shiny coin. In this case, the age old topic of Race in America. Instead of the media talking about how ObamaCare is tanking in the public opinion polls (and even with his very own Blue Dog Democrats), the lead story the very next day on the Today show was the President's comments. In fact, the Gates' Arrest story was the lead story for THREE days.

Bill O'Reilly had it as his talking points on Friday.
I'm sure Keith Olbermann will name the cops as his "Worser" persons or something.
Brian Kilmede on FoxNews will declare that Harvard people are a different race than say Yale people (to which Yale alumni will agree)
Pundits and politicos will all agree that we suddenly need a national dialogue on race.
Glen Beck will take about 45 minutes to rant about something while wearing lederhosen.
The posters over at Huffington Post will declare all police racist and demand that we call them peace officers instead (like Canada and the superior Europeans)
The Daily Show, a comedic cable show where most college students get their news, will poke fun at Dick Cheney just because it can.

The Health Care plan? It's been pushed to a secondary story just ahead of the "Where is Micheal Jackson's Nose mystery".

The President took the downtime that his health care bill wasn't in the spotlight to announce that 1) it was going to be delayed a bit and 2) it may, just may, end up costing middle class Americans a bit more of their money than they expected. (up from ZERO). Meanwhile, Democratic Representatives are being openly laughed at when they attempt to explain how inexpensive free health care is and the President's approval rating fell below 50% for the first time.

Pay no attention folks, be amazed at the wonders over there. Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.

If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
We regret that you blew this out of proportion
While these uncalibrated visions did appear
(With apologies to Bill S.)

Schoolyard Diplomacy

2009-07-23T09:18:00.008-04:00

A young Al Gore demonstrating Man's superior influence on Nature.

It seems like the new administration has decided to not follow President Bush's Cowboy Diplomacy when on the international stage. The Obama Administration went their own way and brought back the dreaded Schoolyard Diplomacy when dealing with rogue countries like North Korea:

I Know You Are, But What Am I?

Apparently Secretary of State Clinton compared North Korea to little boy throwing a hissy fit to seek attention. North Korea came back by calling Clinton a Primary Schoolgirl (BURRRRN!) The Hippos Ass has learned that afterwards, Secretary Clinton snapped back with "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your little nukes will never hurt me."

North Korea then went over to the United Nations and tattled on the U.S. and America got a "time-out."

China, meanwhile, was out at the back fence smoking and trying to pick-up some hot Russian student.

Vegan Group Attacks Hot Dogs

2009-07-22T13:52:00.012-04:00

You know the old saying...if you knew what was in a hot dog, you'd never want to eat one.

But ignorance is bliss, right? Gotta have a nice Dearborn all beef hot dog every once in a while. They sell them in front of my local ACO Hardware store. Mustard: Not Ketchup. Now ballparks are selling Sushi at games. I love sushi...but not at baseball stadiums. Gotta have a dog.

'Course, not knowing what something is made up of can make it difficult to come to an informed decision or conclusion. Take this story about hot dogs for instance.

Hot Dogs Can Cause Cancer, Lawsuit claims

The Detroit Free Press reports that "Hot Dogs CAN cause cancer." The group in question is the American Institute for Cancer Research which on the surface appears to be some sort of cancer prevention group. They want to force hot dog makers to put warnings on their packages. All good, right?

Wrong.

What the Free Press neglects to report is that the group actually advocates a vegan lifestyle and is an anti-meat non-profit organization. So much for getting to the meat of the story. Secondly, the group is placing hot dogs into the same category we place smoking and want to FORCE the hot dog companies to put a warning on their labels. Are hot dogs the best food for you? No. Do the majority of Americans know this? I don't have any numbers, but I'm willing to bet the answer is yes.

If you want to go ahead and have a vegan lifestyle that's fine with me. It's still a free country. In fact, more power to you, as I'm sure that it's tough to do in this society. But I don't go around forming shadow groups so I can pressure people from eating salads or tofu. Live and let live.

Unfortunately, groups like the American Institute for Cancer Research don't care. Their agenda is to get you and everyone else to stop eating meat, one way or the other. They want to make hot dogs as unappealing as possible so no more hot dogs are purchased. But what about bologna? Summer Sausage? You get the idea.

They hide behind a fancy name that on the surface looks good, but if you really knew what it was made of, you'd try not to expose yourself to it all the time.

Kinda like Hot Dogs....

ObamaCare (tm) is not going over so well in middle America.

2009-07-22T09:40:00.008-04:00

Good news! We’ve finally found a member of Congress dumber than Nancy Pelosi

President Obama has sent his lackies in Congress out to their home towns to drum up support for his ObamaCare program. While media outlets like the Washington Post continue to report that the majority of Americans support the President's initiative to destroy insurance companies, reports from the front line indicate a completely different opinion.

Need more proof? Here is Health Secretary Kathleen Sebelius looking like a Deer caught in the headlights after this exchange:

Palin Derangement Syndrome Strikes Again

2009-07-21T14:04:00.003-04:00

Shocker: Vanity Fair Mocks Sarah Palin Sweetness & Light

The word OBSESSION comes to mind. Also the word IDIOTS. In fact, I can think of a few more words...but decorum prohibits me, owing to the fact that The Hippo's Ass is a family site.

Ford tops in quality survey | detnews.com | The Detroit News

2009-07-21T09:45:00.002-04:00

Ford tops in quality survey detnews.com The Detroit News

Looks like American car companies ARE making cars Americans want: Quality cars. Nice Job Ford Motor Company...keep up the good work. If you are reading this, send it to your congressman or congresswoman in Washington. Spread the word.

Oh and yeah....I'm back!

Spent too much time venting over on Facebook until I realized that not everyone wanted to hear my rants. Not that everyone should read my rants, just trying to be a bit more courteous.

So come back here from time to time. I hope to add a few more bells and whistles to the blog and even add an RSS feed and Twitter.

Yeah...I went there.

Drop me a line, send me a story or YouTube video you think needs to be aired. I'll do my best to post it. Send me a comment even if you don't agree with what I post.

Its still a free country...for now.

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Detroit City Hall is Dirty

2008-07-07T17:12:00.004-04:00

Yes, Detroit City Hall is dirty in more ways than one.

More than a week after an "alleged" power surge caused a fire in the basement of the Coleman A. Young Building in Detroit, employees are still not allowed back in the building.

Employees are forced to take vacation days or go without pay.

Mighty convenient. I wonder if any Members of Team Kilpatrick will go without their paycheck or be forced to take a vacation day.

Don't think so.

Meanwhile, Wayne County Prosecutor Kim Worthy announced today that more charges are pending against the Text King Mayor of Detroit.

Then there is the Sludge Scandal that Monica (Do it Baby!) Conyers is involved in. Seems like the Majority of Detroiters like having the wool pulled over their eyes. Seems like the majority of Detroiters like having their tax money misappropriated, misspent and misused. Seems like the majority of Detroiters like having their city looted and given to Team Kilpatrick.

Not me. Not one more dime from this non-represented taxpayer. No Taxation without Representation.

NEXT

About a week and a half ago I got permission from my doctor to start driving again. First thing I did? Went to the Green Brain, a comic store here in Dearborn. Plopped down $20 for An Incredible Hercules (formally the Hulk), Issue #3 of HULK (featuring Red Hulk), two issues of the X-Men and #1 of Secret Invasion, where we find out that the Skrulls have been secretly invading Earth for some time now.

I also bought an issue of Comic Book Monthly.

Not much for $20. I remember when $1 bought FIVE Comics. With $20 back then I would have been safe for nearly a half a year. Now the cost is $2.99. One of the reasons why I gave up reading comics 15 years ago.

But I'm in a Comic Book Mood nowadays. This summer is filled with Comic book goodness. In fact, just got back from the afternoon matinee of Iron Man. Honestly it is one of the best Comic adaptations I've seen. I guess everyone should have some kind of habit. I don't smoke, take drugs, buy porn (that should drive some traffic here) or drink in excess (at least the last two months). $20 a month habit for some comics should be fine.

NEXT TIME: The Final Week at Home

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The Gastro Strikes Back

2008-06-30T19:19:00.004-04:00

Had a small set back not to long after my last entry.

Seems like while my heart was what needed fixing, my internal "gastro" areas got jealous and needed a little attention.

When I was in the hospital the first time, a few days after my open heart surgery, I went to the bathroom, which was nothing more than than a small pull out toilet in the room with small curtain.

After what I felt was a satisfying bowel movement, I called for the nurse to help me back to my bed. Next thing I knew I was sitting in a hospital chair surrounded by white coats. My blood pressure went through the roof after the bowel movement and I fainted.

There is nothing funny about fainting after a bowel movement.

Ok..I guess there is.

Well, after a few weeks at home, and as I wrote, after my last blog entry, I started to feel a little constipated. Then a little more. Then I was gaining weight.

Then I woke up sick, with a fever and bowled over in pain. So I won a beautiful four days, three nights back in the hospital classified NBO (Nothing By Mouth) . The O means Oral.

After a good cleaning by the hospital staff I lost about ten pounds and was cleared to go home. But then I was back on a few meds which made it a little difficult to collect my thoughts.

I've been back home now two weeks and I am 15 pounds lighter than when I went in for my OHS.

In Other News: I want to thank Joe and Mike for stopping by the other week to visit for a while. And I guess I am now the Commish of the Blue Hippo Fantasy Football League.

And the FBI is investigating the Detroit City Council.

Apparently I have a lot to write about now.

NEXT TIME: Sixteen again and I have the keys to the car.

Searching for Lost Time

2008-06-08T20:28:00.003-04:00

Today is my one month post-op anniversary.

And I don't know where the time went. Seriously, each day has blended into the next. While in the hospital, it was hard to develop a timeline as to when what happened.

I've been told that for each hour a patient is under anesthetic, it takes a week for it to leave the system. My surgery was supposed to be only 4 hours, it last a little more than eight.

Which means I'm only halfway to being "clear". (Not to be confused with $cientology's concept of being clear. Crazy Tom Cruise)

Anyway, here I am one month later and I have my good days and bad days. Much of it comes form the medication and some comes from the anesthetic. When they finished replacing my heart valve, they had to open me up and stop some internal bleeding I had. Basically I had two invasive surgeries in the same day.

Luckily thy found the problem: an artery got torn during the surgery.

But again, here it is a month later and it seems like yesterday. I've had a whole month of basically sitting at home doing squat. The first week home was the worst. Couldn't read, walked around like a zombie, couldn't sleep and couldn't taste anything. The pills I was taking made water taste like blended rocks.

But as I mark one month post-op, I'm now trying to make better use of my time. Yeah, I've lost about a month of my life in a medically induced stupor, but now I'm looking forward to the second month.

This week I can start driving again, at least to the corner store.
My medication has been reduced to ten different pills three tiems a day, to five pills, once a day.
Kelly and I are going on a small vacation Up North for a week at the end of June. Time to recouperate someplace different than my living room.
I'm reading a book a week now.

While I've lost a bit of time, its time for me to make up for that by looking forward to times in the future. The Fall fishing trip is only about three months away.

Next time: My Time In The Hospital or Fainting on the Loo.

Trying to remember memories.

2008-06-06T20:04:00.005-04:00

First off, I have to say, what a pathetic performance from the Mayor of Detroit. Yeah, I know he's the Mayor and all, but c'mon. He deserved every boo. The Detroit Red Wings "embiggen" everything great about Detroit; Kwame is what is wrong with Detroit. For him to finish his 30 second speech with "the beer is on me" is beyond unreal.

Its all about Kwame, isn't it?

Enough about that.

Its funny what you remember and how your memory play with your mind.

When I was rolled into the operating room, I was freshly shaved. Not just my face, but my whole body...WHOLE BODY. (except my head).

Its wierd to just nod off one second, then open your eyes and its 12 hours later and have 5 tubes sticking outta me. I don't remember much of a timeline, but I do remember incidents, just not in any order.

I honestly don't remember anything from when I woke up, except for them taking the breathing tube out of me and the blessed joy of having ice cubes to chew on. The operation was on a Monday and I really start tot remember stuff on Wednesday. Maybe late Tuesday.

I remember them taking my neck tube out. Then some metal wire from my chest. The catheter being taken out was Tuesday, I think.

What I remember vividly was the sound of my Wife Kelly telling me I was ok and that everything was going to be alright. I remember my mother telling me to take the ice cubes slowly.

I try to recollect those lost moments, but its fruitless. Much of that time is gone forever. Try as my family does to fill in the blanks, I just can't remember. Maybe its a good thing. My body went though a tramatic experience. This may be one way to heal.

I don't really need those memories. I know my family was there beside me when I came out surgery. .. a surgery that should have only lasted 4 hours.

Instead it lasted twelve becasue when they stitched me up, I started to bleed.

Something went wrong. The surgeon had to go back in.

Through the Looking Glass

2008-06-04T19:55:00.003-04:00

Bugs on the Wall
Polar Bears outside my window
Passing out after having a bowel movement
Severe mood swings
Water that tastes like a blended rock.

Yeah, its been a tough couple of weeks. All I am missing is the Red Queen and the Mad Hatter.

On May 12th I went in for my open heart surgery to get my aortic heart valve replaced. I fully expected to be out of the hospital six days later.

Ten days later I was still in the hospital.

Three weeks my surgeon finally cut back the number of pills I had to take everyday. My head is a bit clearer and I don't feel like a walking zombie anymore. (Speaking of Zombies, read World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie Wars. Good Stuff)

After a little absence from the Hippo's Ass, I back again using this as a way to re-collect and try to focus my thoughts again. The drugs haven't helped my mind. While my body is slowly getting better, being couped up in the house watching Rachel Ray and re-runs of every news story twice can make Jack a dull boy.

Before going into the hospital, I envisioned going home, reading a novel a week, and doing a lot of writing. I'm still trying to finish a book and this is the first bit of writing I've done in almost a month. Thank you cards are even tough.

So if you are interested in what I've been doing the past three and a half weeks, tune in tomorrow and the following days.

I'd also be interested in hearing from you. Drop me a line.

Monty Python in Legoland

2008-05-22T08:00:00.002-04:00

Its Thursday and I should be getting out of ICU today. Hopefully. If all goes according to plan, they will move me to what they call the Cardiac Step Down unit. I may or may not still have a few tubes hooked up to my chest, neck and arm. (We won't mention the catheter)

Meanwhile, here are two more Lego movie shorts that I found on YouTube. I just can seem to get enough of these right now.

Here are two scenes from Monty Python and the Holy Grail

First: The French Taunter

Next up: The Camelot Scene. This one looks more professionally done than the others, but its still funny. If you get a chance, check out some of the others on YouTube.

That is all for now. I should be home Saturday but will probably not post anything till Monday. Till then....

Cake or Death

2008-05-12T08:00:00.001-04:00

No, my surgery wasn't postponed. I have gone the way of Neo and made my way into the Internet. Its keeping me busy while my surgeon is busy mending my heart.

Since I probably won't be laughing much today, I thought I'd at least make you chuckle. Besides, getting open heart surgery is no excuse for not posting on the HA.

Here is another hilarious Eddie Izzard routine, illustrated through the magic of Legos. Courtesy of Thorn2200.

Enjoy!

Popping the Steelhead Cherry

2008-05-11T09:39:00.011-04:00

Final Installment of the Spring Fishing Trip

Written by Joe

Fishing for Steelhead Trout is a lot like sex. For some, it comes naturally, in no time at all you are out in the wilderness, waist deep in a wet river, maneuvering your rod with such skill that with the faintest flick of the tip you gently drift your fly into a hidden honey hole resulting in a heart pounding give and take tango with a glistening hen (aka female steelhead)

And then there is the rest of us who after multiple years of futile attempts find themselves paying for it… and let me tell you, it was worth every penny.

Most of the morning was spent learning from our guide. First we focused on how to handle our rods our reels our line and our flies. Next we learned the secrets of finding the fish and how to approach the hole. Finally after honing our techniques it happens… FISH ON!!!

It was a text book cast played to perfection. Justin drew his nine foot rod back and thrust it forward shooting his line across the mighty Pere Marquete. Dit… Dit… Dit… the sinker bounced of the rocky bottom. Dit… Dit… Dit… the current carried the fly toward the hole. Dit... Dit….. tug?

Tug?

Tug?

FISH ON and all was quiet

What do you mean FISH ON? We never FISH ON? How do we FISH ON? AHHH WHAT DO I DO Justin calls out to our guide.

With all the calm of someone who as caught as many fish as we’ve drank beers our Guide swings into action.

Tip up Justin, keep the tip up.

Let it RUN… Let it RUN… Give it some line…

Ok, good Justin, when you get a chance start to reel.

Justin standing tall and proud in the river mastering his rod maneuvering the… the… the… what? What exactly did Justin have at the end of his line?

SPLASH, with a sudden thrust a massive steelhead trout launches itself from the shallow river bed high into the cool spring air.

SPLASH again the monster steelhead breaches shaking its massive head left and right trying to spit the fly which snared him.

SPLASH… DIVE… RUN the steelhead speeds down river

Scoop

Again with the calm of a master angler our guide nets the fated beast.

Finally after several years of failed attempts, Justin breaks our collective cherry.

Smiling from ear to ear Justin gently grips the monster and raises it from the net holding it high and proud like Yzerman hoisting the holly grail of all sports trophies.

Stage left enter a conflicted fisherman… how could it be? I was the one who was supposed to catch the first steelhead ever. Why Justin? Why not me? A half jealous half proud Joe congratulates Justin on his triumphant catch.

Slowly lowering the mighty catch into the water holding its head upstream allowing the gentle current to pass oxygen through its gills Justin nurtures the trout back from the brink of exhaustion and lets it swim gently away.

We all catch our breath and get back at it. You see the secret of fly fishing for steelhead our guide explains is this… First, as long as you don’t catch the hen, there will always be males around to catch. Second, you never leave fish to find more fish.

So our anglers continue… FISH ON… Again? Twice in a row? How can it be?

Justin begins to reel in fish number two. This time though there is no fight, there is no splashing, Justin reels in a baby brown trout. Our anglers all laugh thinking we’ve seen bait bigger than this little fella. But still, a catch is a catch and that makes it Justin 2, Joe donut. Sorry we can’t tell you about Don just yet, he was fishing another hole.

Our anglers celebrate the recent catch with some fantastic habanera sausage and a cold India Pal Ale (a delicious beer the Canadian brought from the great North)

Another hour goes by and our dynamic duo continue to thrust their rods at the hole hoping to get lucky…

Dit Dit Dit tug…

TUG? FISH ON

FINALLY IT’S JOE’S TURN.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzing line rips off the reel like it were attached to a freight train.

Farther and farther down the river the steelhead swims.

Jump splash not once not twice but five times we see the steelhead break the river’s surface trying to spit the fly.

Tip Up… Rod toward the shore… Reel Reel Reel… run run run Reel Reel Reel wow we have a fighter. This guy isn’t giving up any time soon.

Now I’ve caught huge pike, bad ass walleye, a couple sheep head hogs and a fat belly bass or two in my day, but never has a fish fought for its freedom as much as this guy.

Minute after minute the fish battles to escape until finally after a quarter of an hour he finally subsides

Scoop, way down stream our guide nets Joe’s first steelhead.

This guy was a few inches smaller in length and girth than Justin’s monster (insert that’s what she said joke here) but he was newer to the river. Our guide again emparts some knowledge on our young anglers (note our guide was several years younger than us however in fishing years he was like 740)

You see, Gabe explain, the longer a fish is in the river the darker his color will be and the redder his fins and cheeks will become. Also, the longer they are in the river the less energy they have to fight due to the constant effort they endure to swim the mighty currents.

So, apparently I caught a rookie. And man was he fun to catch.

Justin 1 Steely 1 Brown, Joe 1 Steely, Don we just don’t know

Our anglers celebrate the recent catch with some fantastic habanera sausage and a cold India Pal Ale (a delicious beer the Canadian brought from the great North)

Lunch time… our guide fires up the grill while our anglers continue to perfect their technique.

The delicious smell of grilled marinated chicken fills the air and the faint sizzle and pop of the grill can be heard over the rushing current. Gabe begins to set up for lunch

Dit Dit Dit… tug? FISH ON.

Again Justin hooks into a monster steelhead. With the chicken grilling in the back ground our guide and Justin muscle in another monster fish. Almost as big as the first one. Time for a picture, Justin puts his rod between his teeth and bites down holding the nine footer in place while he and his fellow angler pose for another memory. Another beautiful steelhead catch captured in time.

Fishing makes one kind of hungry, especially at the rate we were nailing them. A brief pause for lunch. And it is scrumptious. Another India Pale Ale another chunk of spicy sausage and its back at it.

Having a few miles of river yet ahead of us our anglers have to leave theses fish to find more fish closer to base camp.

Masterfully Gabe manuvers our boat down stream dodging fallen tree, raging rapids and the occasional fisherman fishing a hopeless spot lacking of gravel and shade. Gabe laughs at them as he passes by explaining the intricacies of finding a good fishing hole. And it becomes clear as day to our anglers, YOU CAN’T CATCH FISH BEHIND THE TROUT POST. Its just not a good spot.

We are nearing the end of our 8 hour float each of us having caught three fish each when out of the corner of his eye Gabe spies a pot of gold… swimming in place behind some rocks in the shadow of a tall pine tree are a school of steelies.

Quickly ditching the boat into the shore and dropping the anchor our anglers leap into the river

WOA! The river is DEEP here and the current is FAST… Gabe looks us in the eyes and asks, can you handle the river here, with trepidation we go all in.

First cast dit dit dit TUG zing… another monster tears down stream ripping line out of Joe’s reel. Jump splash dive

SNAP

For the first time all day our anglers fail to land their prey.

Second Cast, this time it’s Justin

Dit dit dit… tug zing!

Again a monster plows down stream right into the net of our guide.

3 Steelhead 1 Brown for Justin 1 Steelhead 2 Trout for Joe

Dit dit dit… tug zing snap Justin loses the second fish of the day.

Dit dit dit tug zing… FISH ON… Joe catches his second steelie of the day.

Arms aching, spirits high, our anglers muscle up to cast again when on the horizon we see our good friend the professor.

Excited to hear of Don’s success and to share stories of Justin and Joe’s fantastic day our trio unite.

Sigh… none? Zero? No steelhead? How can that be? Justin and Joe caught five steelies and three trout. How can it be that Don had yet to land a treasured prize.

This can not be, it will not be, Joe gives up his spot to his good pal Don and climbs the bank to watch in hope that the professor will school a monster.

What kind of line do you have on this reel our guide asks Don’s guide? Our guide shakes his head at the answer.

What kind of set up do you have on this rod our guide asks Don’s guide? Our guide shakes his head at the answer.

Realizing Don has inferior tools Gabe stands tall beside him in the river coaching him up on technique directing Don toward the fish.

Cast, drift, dit dit dit tug?

Pause

Tug ?

Pause

ZING with more speed and force this fish storm down the river like none before it.

Hard left it turns into some rocks shaking the line under water trying to free itself. Hard right under the boat it swims hoping to rip the line on the sharp edge of the hull. Zing down the river and around the bend the fish swims tearing the line off the reel getting down to the very end.

Standing tall in the river, arms aching, heart pounding Don stands alone as the guides run through the water up stream and out of site to hopefully net this fighter of all fighters.

Tight the line bends Don’s rod nearly dragging his boots along the rocky river bottom then nothing, not tug, line limp, rod straight in Don’s hand… silence…

Then from around the bend our anglers hear a loud cheer. Gabe had netted the beast just as it spit the fly nearly freeing itself from being caught.

Thrashing in the water our guide walks upstream smiling from ear to ear. Don had caught the hen.

A beautiful silver female steelhead. The most striking fish caught all day.
Just over eight hours into our trip, sun beginning to set, our day had ended.

As Don coached the hen back to health letting her swim down stream so went the males that filled our lucky spot.

Justin 3 Steelhead 1 Brown, Joe 2 Steelhead 2 Rainbow, Don 1 amazing female steelhead.

Editor's Note: When I first heard that I was not able to go on the Spring Fishing trip, I was sorely upset. After all these years of not catching fish on the Pere Marquette, I just knew that this was going to be the trip. I thought I would be bitter and jealous.

But after reading these reports and when I first saw the photos of Joe, Justin and Don catching what may well be the most spectacular fish we've ever caught on our Fishing Trips, I was not jealous, I was extremely happy. That's what these fishing trips are all about. I wasn't there with them personally, but I was there in spirit.

There is always the next trip to personally catch fish...So, where are we going in October???

This week while I am in the Hospital, I've left a few posts for you to read. Tune in after today. Enjoy.

Jeff Vader

2008-05-09T08:00:00.000-04:00

This is frakkin hilarious.

Darth Vader at the Death Star Cafeteria

YouTube User Thorn2200 created these to comedian Eddie Izzard's stand up routine.

Simply Genius!

Mayor Tootsie, Versed and McCain/Clinton?

2008-05-08T10:53:00.012-04:00

Could This Happen?

Right now there is no way that Hillary Clinton will catch up to Barak Obama in delegate counts. It would probably take ALL of the Super Delegates to go for Hillary for her to win the Democrat Nomination.

Rumor has it, Michigan and Florida are considering giving Hillary 55% of their delegates and Obama 45% just to get them seated at the convention. Not enough to put Clinton over the top.

John McCain has made it no secret his desire to play peace maker, trying to bridge the gap between Democrats and Republicans. Some even thought he might leave the Republican Party a few years back to become a Democrat.

Consider this: Is a McCain/Clinton ticket possible? Could Hillary pledge her supporters to McCain and run on a “Unity Ticket”? How bad do the Clintons want back into the White House?

Versed: Preferred by 9 out of 10 Death Row Inmates

Last week I had my catheterization. The procedure wasn’t that bad, it lasted all of one hour and I was pretty doped up on Versed all the time. I spent six hours on my back watching re-runs of Different Strokes. One was the episode where Arnold and his friend get taken advantage of by Mr. Carlson from WKRP in Cincinnati, who plays a perverted white man with a camera. Why this two part episode didn’t garner an Emmy nomination, I’ll never know.

For every hour you have anesthesia in your system, it takes almost a week for it to leave. Saturday, all I did was eat and pass out. Now I’ve been limping all week because the swelling in my thigh went down and I am sore and bruised. It should be completely healed by the time I go back into the hospital for some more pain.

Then I find out this little tidbit about Versed:

Versed is offered to death row inmates before execution in the United States, according to the film The Missouri Protocol (1990). A Missouri prison doctor interviewed in the film said virtually no prisoners turned down the drug when it was offered a few hours prior to execution.

Had I known, I would have demanded a “Last Supper” of my grandmother’s meatloaf, mashed potatoes and corn.

The countdown for me has started. Monday is coming up pretty fast. I’m hoping I get the “employee dosage” next week when I finally go in for my OHS. I don’t want to even remember that I had a breathing tube in. That’s what is bothering me the most: Waking up to find myself on a ventilator, helping me to breathe.

There were two things I told Kelly, 1) keep giving me the pain drugs and 2) get the damn breathing tube out of me as soon as possible.

Three full days left.

Mayor Tootsie

Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick is denying that this is him dressed up as a woman for a school play:

(Hint: He's the one in the red dress). Team Kilpatrick is vehemently denying it. Detroit Ministry of Truth Director Denise Tolliver even went so far as to threaten to sue the New York newspaper that printed the story. Several of Mayor Tootsie’s classmates confirm that it was him in the play. What’s the big deal? It's not like we all haven’t dressed up in women’s clothing once in our lives. I’ve done it twice (that I know or admit to). The top two funniest comedies of the 20th Century (Some Like it Hot and Tootsie) both have men dressed as women. Monty Python. Kids in the Hall. ‘Nuff Said.

But I guess that would just ruin his image as the Hip Hop Mayor and destroy his street cred. Kilpatrick is so full of himself that he unless he controls the flow of information (or propaganda) he gets upset. Busted is what you see, Kwame.

His “Minister of Truth” Denise Tolliver isn’t doing a very good job of “keeping it real” in the media. Tolliver failed in her propaganda role to stop a national show from mocking King Kwame.

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart ripped Kwame the other evening in their broadcast on Comedy Central. Watch this clip below. Its 7 minutes long, but well worth your time.

Ah Kwame…I guess we ARE all out to get you, with good reason. Now that the National Media is openly mocking the Sex Text Mayor, when will we see the Detroit Corporate Community finally step up and demand that Kilpatrick step down? Why won’t Roger Penske, Mike Ilitch of Little Caesars, Tony Earley of DTE, Peter Karmanos of Compuware or David Brandon of Detroit Renaissance, (just to name a few) do the right thing. What are they afraid of?

Kwame won’t step down till Team Kilpatrick is finished looting the city of Detroit. He still has 20 months till election time to compete the job. Unless the citizens of Detroit succeed in recalling him or the Business Community starts acting like LEADERS, Team Kilpatrick will continue to steal from the hard working taxpayers of Detroit to fill the gold lined pockets of his cronies.

Tomorrow: The final installment of the Spring Fishing Trip where we actually get to see pictures of Fish.

Coming Soon: Scott goes “off the grid” for a while.

The Sound of Distant Thunder

2008-05-05T16:04:00.008-04:00

No one needed the alarm to wake them up… in fact, collectively our three fishermen shared just a few scant hours of sleep between them. Who could sleep… just knowing the impending sunrise would mark the beginning of our journey up the Pere Marquette river to catch the elusive Steelhead Trout was enough to keep even the most sleepy of our fishermen wide awake.

Beep Beep Beep the unnecessary alarm rang out announcing to everyone in the cabin that it was time to catch trophy fish.

Beep Beep Beep the unnecessary alarm rang out again reminding everyone of our brethren who could not make the trip.

Beep Bee…… silence, in the quiet of the cabin we hear the Canadian ask “pull my finger”

So, with a small thunder the adventure begins.

Fun FACT #1 Pull My Finger is a joke or prank regarding flatulence
in which a mark is asked to pull the finger of the illusionist (or person
playing the joke), who simultaneously flatulates so as to suggest a causal
relationship between the pulling of the finger and the subsequent expulsion
of gas. References in popular culture tend to treat "pull my finger" as a meme, saying the line but not showing the result, apparently on the assumption that the result is well known.>

Our trio race out the door guzzling coffee, chomping Pop-Tarts and dodging deer as we reach outrageous speeds negotiating the twists, turns and dips of the two track road to civilization.

There it is, up on the right. We see two guides, two monster trucks (one Chevy one F150) and two boats parked in front of the PM Lodge. It’s a beautiful site.

Clint and Gabe are the guides. Not what we expected, to say the least. Clint a dead look alike to Ned Flanders until he takes off his hat revealing a more Homer Simpson like bald melon and Gabe, the 23 year old anti-corporate America, fish-or-die-youngster greet us in the parking lot.

Fun FACT #2: (From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) Gabe was born on March 31, 1994. he is currently in 8th grade going on 9th. He has many friends including Ashley M., Salina C., and Jordan R. He is Tall, Funny, and Smart.
hello. this is ashley speaking now. Gabe is the raw deal. i freaking love him. =] ♥♥
Retrieved from "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabe"

Justin refuses to ride in a Chevy when there is beefy Ford to style in, so he, the Professor and Clint take off to the boat launch. Joe rides off with Gabe.

On the journey to the launch we learn a little more about the trek we are about to endure. First the bad news, due to the nature of stream fishing, it is difficult to keep two boats together floating down the river at the same time. A) the current is just too difficult to manage and B) there just isn’t enough room for two boats to fish the same fishing hole. So or trio must divide in order to concur.

One… Two… Three… NOT IT… Justin and Joe team up with Gabe and Don heads off on his own with Clint.

Just getting in the boat was an adventure. Justin in front, Joe in the back and Gabe in the middle.

45 minutes into our float down the river we catch up with Don and Gabe. Don already waist deep in the cool river, rod in hand, guide by his side casting into our first fishing hole. It was like a Norman Rockwell photo.

Justin, Joe and Gabe settle in a hundred yards down stream and the fishing begins…

Well, not exactly. The fishing didn’t really take place until multiple attempts to teach Justin the following technique.

Roll cast, flick, mend, mend, drift set the hook….

Ok, your turn Justin… roll cast, flick…
Ok, try again, Justin… roll cast, flick, mend…
Ok, try again Justin… roll cast, flick, mend (so close this time) mend…
Ok, try again Justin… roll cast…
Ok Justin, lets try something else…

So another 45 minutes passes as Gabe tries to get Justin set up all the while Don is fishing just a short way up stream catching a nice trout and Joe sits miserably watching EVERYONE ELSE get to fish. Really not a good start for Joe… nonetheless he is patient…
Justin tries a new technique: rip some line, hold it with your left hand swing your rod around and cast across the river, drift, drift, drift set the hook. Got it?

Good, your turn… Rip some line, hold, swing the rod… snag
Ok, Try again Justin… Rip some line, hold, swing the rod, cast… snag…
Ok, Try again Justin… Rip some line, hold, swing the rod, cast, drift drift drift… no fish but FINALLY we have made fishing!!!

After another 45 minutes of teaching Justin how to cast, Gabe points the bow of the little boat down stream to seek out a spot where our brave fishermen would break their collective Steelhead cherries.

Coming Soon: After Four Trips, Two Fly Rods and Copious Amounts of Kesslers, the Guys Finally Catch a Fish.

But Next Time... Versed: The White Man's Crack.

A City Full of Idiots

2008-05-01T12:18:00.009-04:00

That’s not my opinion, that’s the opinion of Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick’s sister, Ayanna Kilpatrick. In a message sent after one of Kilpatrick's cronies lost a special City Council election and bond proposals the mayor supported were defeated, Ayanna texted Christine Beatty on April 29, 2003:

"Long road ahead of us! How do you educate voters in a city full of idiots ...?!"

This is exactly how Team Kilpatrick views the taxpaying citizens and workers in the City of Detroit. To them, you are all just idiots with open wallets; an endless supply of money to fill the gold-lined pockets of Kwame Kilpatrick's family and cronies.

Ayanna headed up the Next Vision Foundation, a charity Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick's family established to help city students. The Charity spent more than half of its money on salaries for three employees: the mayor's sister, his wife Carlita and the wife of one of Kilpatrick's best friends.

More than $395,000 of the $717,000 the foundation raised in 2002 and 2003 from other charities, local businesses, casinos and city contractors was paid to Ayanna Kilpatrick, the mayor's sister, first lady Carlita Kilpatrick and Lisa Cylar Miller.Tax records and interviews show that:

Ayanna Kilpatrick was paid a $100,966 salary last year, 14 percent more than she received in 2002.
Carlita Kilpatrick, who had a part-time job doing marketing and event planning, received $22,666 for less than a full year's work in 2003. In 2002, she received $44,231 for her part-time position.

Want more proof?

WXYZ aired a Steve Wilson story revealing that Kilpatrick, his family and a babysitter vacationed at an exclusive southern California spa a couple of years back, with the Kilpatrick Civic Fund, another nonprofit charity founded by the mayor, paying the lion's share of a $10,000 hotel tab. Officials at the fund — which is run by Kilpatrick's sister, Ayanna Kilpatrick, and has Christine Beatty, the mayor's chief of staff, as its treasurer — claimed the mayor was out West trying to raise money for the charity.

City Council is no Better

Watch this YouTube video of a young Detroit Student taking Monica "Do it Baby" Conyers to task for her "Shrek" moment.

So no, Ayanna Kilpatrick, not ALL Detroiters are idiots; just the ones who are members of Team Kilpatrick.

Heart Update: Tomorrow I am going in for a Cardiac Catheterization. Cardiac catheterization is usually performed to evaluate heart valves, heart function and blood supply.

I will be semi- awake and able to follow instructions during the catheterization. A mild sedative is usually given 30 minutes before the procedure to help you relax. The actual procedure may last about an hour, but afterwards, I will be laying on my back for about 5 hours.

After the test, the catheter is removed. Since the IV is placed in my groin, I will need to lie flat on my back for a few hours after the test to avoid bleeding. This may cause some mild back discomfort since this may take up to 5 or 6 hours.

No Driving or Drinking for 48 hours. Next stop: Open heart surgery on the 12th.

I’m hoping to get the last update from the Men’s Fishing Trip from Joe soon. Then I will post some pictures.

A Newlywed Man, A Professor and a Canadian go Fishing

2008-04-28T12:15:00.007-04:00

The Men’s Spring Fishing Trip by Joe
Translated by Scott

It was the best of times it was the worst of times. A newlywed man, a professor and a Canadian, three brave fishermen, traveled north to the mighty Pere Marquette River in Baldwin Michigan for the start of the Men’s Spring Fishing trip. Their hearts were heavy as they grieved the absence of their trusty fishing pal who we'll call old-ticker, who, under doctor’s orders was forced to stay home and play an idiotic game of Fishing on his Wii. But their hopes were high of catching an elusive trophy steelhead.

So you could have a profile of Baldwin, I went to Epodunk.com, who specializes in profiling more than 46,000 cities and towns in the United States. This map comes from their site:

Lesson here? Don’t use Epodunk.com because they have no idea what they are writing about.

Many people come to Baldwin Michigan to take in some of the local festivities which include the annual Blessing of the Bikes and the annual Miss Lake County pageant. One notable spot that many tourists visit for a tasty treat on a hot summer day is Mom and Dad's Cone Shoppe. According to Wikipedia, Mom and Dad's has about the biggest one scoop cone that you will ever see.

The Famous Pere Marquette river is named after Father Jacques Marquette (June 1, 1637–May 18, 1675 [1]) a French missionary who founded Michigan's first European settlement, Sault Ste. Marie, and later founded St. Ignace, MI. He died of dysentary because Kesslers wouldn't be invented for at least another 200 years or so...

Four fishing trips had been attempted up at the PM, none successful. This year would be the first time we actually asked for help. Our mission: to hire a guide and find out what we’ve been doing wrong all these years.

The crew left the Warren hood at 4:13 PM on a sunny Thursday afternoon. Not long into their trek north came the first stop, Bass Pro Shops. This trip could have been completely avoided if the Canadian would have shared his secret "on-line" fishing license purchase website. Additionally, the only real purpose the newlywed’s newly purchased rain coat served was to ward off any sign of rain at all. And the professor’s polarized sun glasses became more of a fashion statement than an integral fishing tool. Nonetheless, the three enjoyed the stop, which took about an hour longer than it need be.

Apparently our trio was lost without the guidance and decision making ability of old-ticker, who was home noticing there was a hatch going on in his back yard.

Our trio survived the dreaded detour around the haunted open structure Zilwaukee Bridge, a grand monument to the wasteful spending of our hard earned tax money, and eventually landed at a pizza and grinder shop just 30 minutes outside of Baldwin. The sign on the wall read, buy two subs get the third one free. That is unless you purchase and pay for two subs individually in that case you did not buy "two" subs rather two people purchased "one" sub a piece therefore do not qualifying for the "free" third sub. A trick most city folk fall for we assumed. Where was old-ticker to thwart the man's evil sub deception? He was home watching a repeat of Rock of Love II.

Next stop... COLD BEER and breakfast. A simple early evening task? Think again...

Stop one, Wesco gas station... loads of beer, three kinds of pop-tarts, no packet oatmeal (the Canadian wanted stick to your ribs oatmeal...next

Stop two, Gas station up the street from Wesco... loads of beer, same three kinds of pop-tarts but again, no oatmeal ... next

Stop three, grocery store CLOSED

Stop four, Only gestation left in town, same loads of beer, same three kinds of pop-tarts, still no oatmeal... frustrated, our trio purchases beer, pop-tarts, ice-cream, peanut butter (a fishing trip staple) coffee cream, water, coffee filters and ice... we almost left without the ice.

DID YOU KNOW? In 1971, a cartoon character named Milton the Toaster was introduced to promote Pop-Tarts. The campaign ended when a commercial showed a child hugging the toaster, leading to complaints that children might imitate the commercial and burn themselves. True story.

When you are single, the dizzy air headedness of women can sometimes be endearing, at least temporarily. When you get married, you find that they become all too annoying and you wonder why you even talk to them at all. Consider the conversation our newlywed had with the female clerk at on of the gas stations:

Newly Wed: Do you have water Whack Job: What do you think is in the coolers
Newly Wed: No, I mean large jugs of water
Whack Job: You walked right by it
Newly Wed: Um...ok, how are the steelhead biting
Whack Job: Pretty good, but you folks should try the Tippy Damn
Newly Wed: Really, what are they biting on
Whack Job: Some yellow fuzz and a hook

A small debate occurs, do we trust the Canadian's keen tracking abilities and sense of direction,(some call it the Spirit of the North, others call it JustinJustin) or do we trust the professor's high tech global positioning system to find the trout post... Good for our trio we had both.

The instant our trio hit dirt road... crack fizz, crack fizz, crack fizz... three delicious beers never tasted so good.

Scared out of his mind the newlywed unlocks the trout post door and creeps down into the dark spider infested basement to switch on the electricity... Normally this is old-ticker's job, which we totally too for granted all those years.

With the lights are on and the all wheel drive Subaru unpacked and sleeping arrangements accounted for (the Canadian claims the master suite, the newlywed claims the empty bed room and the professor claims the couch, because he is the boss and doesn’t want anyone to step on his head if they get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom (The Office reference)). The trio settle in for the night sipping 12 year old scotch, drinking India pale ale and lamenting about years past when there fellow brethren had also made the trip with them.

Next Time: BEEP BEEP BEEP 6:00 AM time to go fishing...

White Man seeking Mechanical Heart Valve and Presidential Candidate

2008-04-25T13:41:00.002-04:00

First, something to make your blood boil.

Recently, Nora Ephron wrote in her Huffington Post blog:

This is an election about whether the people of Pennsylvania hate blacks more than they hate women. And when I say people, I don't mean people, I mean white men. How ironic is this? After all this time, after all these stupid articles about how powerless white men are and how they can't even get into college because of overachieving women and affirmative action and mean lady teachers who expected them to sit still in the third grade even though they were all suffering from terminal attention deficit disorder -- after all this, they turn out (surprise!) to have all the power. (As they always did, by the way; I hope you didn't believe any of those articles.)

(the) outcome of the general election will depend on whether enough of them (white males) vote for McCain. A lot of them will: white men cannot be relied on, as all of us know who have spent a lifetime dating them. And McCain is a compelling candidate,
particularly because of the Torture Thing. As for the Democratic hope that McCain's temper will be a problem, don't bet on it. A lot of white men have terrible tempers, and what's more, they think it's normal.

Seems like the Democrats have chosen who the “Big Bad” is for this election: White Men.

Expect to see more like this in the coming months as we get closer to election time.

A couple of heart updates:

First, I decided to go with the mechanical valve over the bovine. Mechs (as the cool heart patients call them) last far longer than animal tissue. The only drawback is that I have to take Coumadin for the rest of my life. Every week I will need to test my blood to make sure the coagulation level is correct. Because I am on this “blood thinner” I will need to be careful about what I do to avoid serious cuts or internal bleeding. Excessive amounts of alcohol are out.

Meaning the days I did a keg stands after the rugby matches are long gone.

The alternative would be the animal valve, which I would have to get replaced every ten years.

I’ll give up the rugby matches.

Secondly, after I made the decision to go with mechanical, the rollercoaster ride began. Just this morning I met with my surgeon. We went over the details of the operation, the risks and the recovery period.

As I wrote before, the incision won’t be as long. Typically it’s around 6 – 9 inches; mine will be around 3 inches. It’s going to take me roughly six weeks to recover; possibly eight. I certainly won’t be able to drive till around week five.

Overall, it will be a good six months till I am fully recovered. I’m shooting for an early October Fall Fishing Trip, depending on how my rehab goes. Keep those dates open. Preferably someplace we can get a pontoon boat or something comfortable as I probably still won’t be 100% yet.

Then came the big moment for me: setting the date for my open heart surgery:

Monday, May 12….Roughly two weeks from now.

Once the rollercoaster ride starts moving, you can’t get off.

Next stop: Cardiac Catheterization or You’re going to put WHAT through my Groin?

NOTE: I will have an update on last week’s Fishing trip probably later this weekend. Promise. Joe sent in Part I of his report and as soon as I am finished formatting it, I will put it up.

Fear and Loathing in the Democrat Party

2008-04-22T16:59:00.012-04:00

The contempt that the liberal academic elite feel toward normal, working class Americans is beginning to become all to evident. Barak Obama’s recent remarks on the “bitter” working class people of Pennsylvania is a crack in the glossy façade that threatens to unveil the true “wizards” behind the curtain of the Democrat Party.

Huffington Post political Editor, Thomas Edsall, in his recent blog: On Course for Another White Guy Election, wrote:

(Hillary) Clinton has set the stage for an election in which a crucial voting block will once again be white men, and the issues will be those that tend to push these voters to the right, towards the Republican Party, regardless of which Democrat is the nominee.

Those issues of course being themes like patriotism, gun control, terrorist threats, intimidation (reverse racism) by a black preacher, and a 3AM phone call signaling enemy attack.

The article is posted alongside this photo of the type of “White Men” Edsall must envision make up the bitter, gun toting, god-fearing, law abiding population that want only to bring down Obama because he is black or vote against their best interests simply because they are too ignorant to realize it.

Imagine if someone were to write a blog about work habits of Mexican Immigrants and posted this picture along with the article.

Further on in his blog he writes:

“Just last year, Democratic political scientist Thomas F. Schaller was breathing a sigh of relief over the prospect that white men were a steadily diminishing factor in the political landscape. In an essay titled "So long, white boy" published September 17, 2007 on Salon, Schaller wrote:

"The Democratic obsession with the down-home, blue-collar, white male voter,that heartbreaker who crossed the aisle to the Republicans many decades ago, may finally be coming to a merciful end....it's a waste of time and resources for the Democrats to pursue them -- a classic sucker's bet....Democrats finally seem to realize that cultural contortionism in the pursuit of Bubba produces little more than smiles on the faces of Republican consultants."

You can read the entire blog here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/04/22/on-course-for-another-whi_n_97965.html

Both Edsall and now Schaller are of the group whose self esteem must really be the pits that they feel the need to look down their noses at us and tell us we are wrong, but just to ignorant to realize it. These are the upper echelon of Democrat Party Members who live in their small academic worlds, filled with disgust for you and me. To them, patriotism is jingoistic, guns are to be feared, going to church is like believing in the flying spaghetti monster, and laws should not be followed if you are anything other than a white male.

Remember that come election time. McCain is not perfect. Hell, I voted for Ron Paul in the primary because I wanted to teach the Republicans a lesson. But four years of Democrats in the White House may make the entire nation similar to Berkeley, where elected officials voted to remove the Armed Forces station from the city limits.

Back to the photo, if it was meant to characterize the “mentality” of white male voters, to those on the left that feel superior because they can tell the difference between a Fork and Spork, it may have a different result.

To me, these two fellows, based on looks alone, look pretty happy. They obviously don’t need a Prius as a status symbol or feel the need to spend $5 on a latte at Starbucks when a $1.25 jumbo Papst Blue Ribbon will do just as well. If I had the choice to hang out with “intellectuals” like Edsell or these two, I’d pull up a seat on the porch any day.

They probably know where all the good fishing holes are too.

For those of you interested, Tom Edsell is the author of Chain Reaction and Building Red America. Tom can be reached at edsall@huffingtonpost.com.

From the Heart: I've made my decision on heart valves. I'm going with the St. Jude Mechanical Valve. I'll tell you why later. For now, the next step is contacting my surgeon and getting the process in motion. It's now only a matter of time.

Next Time: More White Man Bashing or the Democrats Current Talking Points.

Artificial or Live Bait?

2008-04-21T08:39:00.021-04:00

During this time of the year I'm usually picking out new lures for my tackle box. Instead I'm trying to make the decision on whether to go with an artificial heart valve or one made from animal skin.

As with lures, do I go with artificial or live bait?

Kelly and I went to see my surgeon for the first time last Thursday. A couple of things came from that meeting:

1) Seems like I'm going to need the operation sooner rather than later. Already knew this, but the time frame is now 1 - 1 1/2 months.

2) I may not need as invasive of surgery as previously thought. Here is picture of what open heart surgery would have looked like:

Not pretty. That would have been revenge for all those fish I filleted over the years. Now, my Doc may be able to operate in a less than invasive procedure, which will hasten my recovery time and leave me with less pain. Instead of feeling like I've been run over by a locomotive, it will now feel like I've been run over by a Prius.

3)I can't eat sushi. Seriously. Well...I could eat sushi, but no soy sauce, not even the low sodium stuff which still has something like pound of salt in a teaspoon. When I asked my Doc about what type of diet I should be looking at, of all the foods he could have named, he said "No Sushi."

No Fishing trip...no sushi. I smell a conspiracy here.

Finally, back to choosing lures. Right now my only decision is choosing the right heart valve.

If I go with mechanical as seen here, It lasts upwards of 30 years, but I will have to be on Coumadin the rest of my life. Its an anti-coagulant that helps stop blood clots from forming. Blood clots lead to stroke. Plus, I would have to stop any physical activity that would lead to internal bleeding, so my days as a professional rugby player would be over.

If I go with a bovine valve, (the donor seen on the left), I won't need the Coumadin necessarily, but the valve is only good for 10 - 15 years max. Meaning I would have to undergo another operation to get that replaced.

I don't like going to the dentist so having to schedule an OHS every ten years will not make me a happy camper.

I am seeking two second opinions this week I've contacted the Cleveland Clinic and University of Michigan. We'll see if they get back to me; if not, then I will make the decision by Friday. Next step, actually setting the date for the operation.

Next Time: Justin's near-record steelhead: Hoax or Fish of a Lifetime?

BREAKING!: The Hippos Ass has obtained actual photos of the fishing trip and will post them soon. Stay tuned.

Outta My Thursday Moaning Mind...

2008-04-17T11:08:00.007-04:00

The Hippo’s Ass read that Detroit Assistant Police Chief Dunlap is a proud owner of a Green Team Kilpatrick Jacket. Word on the street is he wears it even during meetings with Police Reserves.

Looks like The Detroit City Council finally grew a pair. Even though three members of the Council seem to be firmly in the back pocket of Team Kilpatrick (the Tiara wearing Barbara Rose Collins, Monica “DO IT, BABY! DO IT!” Conyers and Martha “I’m just famous” Reeves), the Majority decided not to entertain Mayor Kilpatrick’s grandstanding and firmly dismissed the Mayor when he arrived to present his budget. The council did their due-diligence and accepted the written budget, which is all they really need to do.

Apparently I’m a bitter person because I own two guns, go to church and believe that illegal immigrants should follow the laws of our country. Fancy that! Barak “The next President of the United States” Obama is a typical academic elitist liberal. We are just too stupid to realize that he is right. Anyone else think his posters look similar to Communist Propaganda posters from the Stalin era? You decide.

I hope Joe, Don, Justin and Chris all catch some fish up at the Pere Marquette River this weekend. The only thing worse than not being able to go is having them not catch anything up there.

Going to pull the boat out of my garage this weekend (with a little help because I can’t pull or lift anything right now). I need to get the throttle fixed now before I get laid up. The engine needs a tune-up as well. When we go Up North in August, I want it water ready. No telling what shape I will be in at the time so it needs to be easy to start and use as possible.

Speaking of boats…remember that couple that disappeared a while back and their boat was found abandoned in Lake Huron with the motor running? There is a mighty strange rumor floating around the internet about these two and a connection with a certain “Strawberry”. More later….

From the Heart: My first appointment with my Surgeon was today. I'll give an update tomorrow because it might be a little long.

Next Time: A Heart Update unless Kwame and the CLownsil do something stupid again.

Is this how you "represent" Detroit?

2008-04-14T14:24:00.006-04:00

What the Frak is going on?!?!?

Yup...You guessed it. That is the "Queen" herself, Detroit Councilwoman Barbara Rose Collins at a council meeting Monday to discuss Mayor Kilpatrick's budget scheme. She came to the meeting wearing a tiara because it was her Birthday over the weekend.

Welcome to the City Clownsil Circus of Detroit.

You will remember that Barbara Rose Collins is the council member who insulted philanthropists in Metro Detroit, calling their volunteerism on Detroit-based non-profit boards, a "Slave-Master mentality" because they dared to live in the suburbs but were willing to help out the needy in Detroit.

Collins, according to the Metro Times, once held a fundraiser in a strip club, shortly after firing an aide for being gay.

When the Detroit Zoological Society offered to take control over the ailing Detroit Zoo and help relieve some of the City's financial burden, Collins voted against it saying, "This is not a plantation. Black people are no longer owned by white people."

Then there is this nice little ditty:

The Greater Corktown Development Corp had presented the City Council a list of nine Corktown residents it wanted on the Citizens District Council to help direct the (Tiger Stadium) project. But the initial list was rejected due to complaints because there were too many white people on it. Of the proposed members, six were white, two were Hispanic and one was black.

"I don't like that list," City Councilwoman Barbara-Rose Collins said at a council meeting.... "I would not approve any CDC that is all white in a city that is 90 percent black, even though the location is Corktown, and there's a lot of white people in that area."

As a taxpayer to the City of Detroit I don't like the fact that City Clownsil and the Mayor can misspend my money anyway they please but they won't give me any representation for my taxation. So there.

No wonder Southeast Michigan has trouble luring world-classed businesses to the City. When they look at the council and see one of its members dressed like a 7 year old girl, they must shake their heads in wonder.

From the Heart: Good news! The appointment with my surgeon has been moved up to this week. It was originally scheduled for early May. Now I won't have to wait so long. Check back later this week for an update.

Next Time: Revenge of Shrek, or How Some City Council Members Finally Grew Some.

YO! Big Bro is Watching You!

2008-04-14T10:11:00.004-04:00

As if wasting $8.4 million of Detroit Taxpayers money wasn’t enough, the embattled Mayor of Detroit has created his own version of the Ministry of Truth from the novel 1984.

The Kwame Kilpatrick administration, or as they refer to themselves, “Team Kilpatrick”, complete with matching green jackets, has hired a Media Watch company to patrol television news reports, radio stations, print media and the internet for any “biased” reporting on Kilpatrick’s perjury, obstruction of justice conspiracy and conduct unbecoming of a public official.

George Orwell is spinning in his grave.

So since this media watch company searches by key words and full names, let me just say this:

Kwame Kilpatrick, you are a fool and a crook. Resign now you big dummy!

Team Kilpatrick’s Ministry of Truth is headed up by his hired PR person, “Minister of Truth” Denise Tolliver who has already admonished a Florida TV station for reporting a 20 second story on the Mayors crooked deeds. Apparently reporting the truth is “biased”.

Seems like Kilpatrick can’t spend this taxpayer’s money fast enough, huh?

Michigan’s economy is bad enough as it is and we would hate for Minister Tolliver to lose her job, so I will be featuring a Team Kilpatrick Minute in each of my blogs. As long I use his complete name, I’ll be sure that Team Kilpatrick is reading this and keeping Tolliver busy. Since I pay taxes, but am not allowed a voice on Council or a vote (Taxation without Representation), this may be my only way to voice my discontent with the crooks and cronies running the City of Detroit.

Meanwhile, the City Clouncil is doing its best to make Detroit the butt of jokes.

After shouts of “You’re not my Daddy, don’t disrespect me! and Do it Baby! Do it!” Detroit Clowncilwoman Monica Conyers degraded the City of Detroit further by calling Clouncil President Cockrel “Shrek”. I don’t know about you, but Shrek was pretty lovable.

See the verbal exchange here:

Maybe Monica Conyers sees herself as Donkey. Donkey was pretty annoying, but also lovable and there is nothing lovable about Conyers. Regardless, she’s certainly making a “Donkey” of herself if you get my drift.

Monica Conyers: this week’s Hippos Ass Award Recipient.

Heart Update: I have an appointment with my surgeon for May 6th to discuss next steps. That's the first available slot, but I'm on a wait list if there is an opening.

Crossroads

2008-04-11T13:14:00.002-04:00

There is a Philip K. Dick story about a man who wakes to find that terrorists placed a bomb in his chest. At any moment he could explode.

A month and a half ago I was ok. I was healthy. Plans for the summer were being made. There was a vacation with my wife to Lake Cumberland in May. We were going to rent a houseboat for a week. This year’s Spring Fishing Trip with my buddies was going to be up at the Pere Marquette River in Michigan. It was time to pull the old Glassmaster boat out of the garage and get it ready for walleye fishing on the Detroit River. The garden needed tilling.

But I wasn’t healthy. I wasn’t ok. I was inching closer and closer to a massive coronary heart attack and didn’t even know it. I was on the way to being one of those people you hear about: “He seemed perfectly healthy then one day, boom, heart attack, at such a young age.”

Back to the bomb in my chest. Damn Terrorists. I’m more conscious about my heart beat. I can FEEL it beating now more than ever. Right now I have a 50% chance of having a heart attack in the next two years.

When my cardiologist told me it wasn’t a good idea to go fishing and to put a limit on what I do, it finally hit home. No Fishing Trip. No vacation with my wife. No getting the boat ready. No gardening. No exercising. No excessive climbing of stairs. No heavy lifting, no stress etc, etc, etc…And this is just BEFORE my operation.

Although something is different, I’m still the same person. But I have different plans now to deal with.

I’d hate to put the pressure on my wife and my friends, having something happen to me in the middle of the woods, with little cell phone coverage, more than 30 minutes away from any major health facility. So, on the advice of my doctor, I’m going to put off many of my plans.

A little inconvience now ensures that I have many more chances to enjoy vacations with my wife and family, fishing trips with my friends, and many more chances to see my garden in bloom.

I don't want this blog to be a Whoa is me Blog. I just wanted to get this out there. But I promise to keep you updated as things progress. And should you be going through the same thing, drop me a line...I'd love to hear your story.

Especially if you really DO have a bomb in your chest.

Since I can't go fishing, I guess I'll try frying some bigger fish.

Next Time: Team Kilpatrick’s Ministry of Truth, or Yo! Big Bro Got the Peeps on You!

Aortic Stenosis: 12th Cylon?

2008-04-10T12:36:00.003-04:00

According to Wikipedia, Aortic Stenosis is a valvular heart disease caused by the incomplete opening of the aortic valve.

Major causes and predisposing conditions of aortic stenosis include acute rheumatic fever and bicuspid aortic valve. As individuals age, calcification of the aortic valve may occur and result in stenosis. This is especially likely to occur in people with a bicuspid aortic valve, but also occurs in the setting of perfectly normal valves as a result of age-induced 'wear and tear'.

Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you are getting the best possible information.

Michael Scott The Office

Apparently I had a mild form of rheumatic fever when I was younger. The fevers were attributed to tonsillitis and stopped when my tonsils were removed.

I also have a mild regurgitation. Dave had regurgitation once, but that was due to small woodland creatures. Mine is basically backwash in my heart chamber.

I hate backwash. When I was younger, my brother Dean would purposely backwash into a bottle of pop just so that he could claim the rest of the pop for himself. Little bits of food floating to the top would gross me out.

There is also a Battlestar Galactica wiki here: http://en.battlestarwiki.org/wiki/Main_Page

The 12th Cylon (WARNING: HERE THERE BE SPOILERS)

The first Hybrid gives a monologue about his knowledge of the Final Five in the extended version of "Razor". It states that "...the fifth is still is in shadow, drawn toward the light, hungering for redemption, that will only come in the howl of terrible suffering."
I think the key word here is redemption.

My guess: Tom Zarek. He is also portrayed by actor Richard Hatch, who portrayed the original Apollo in the Original Series. “…this has happened before and will happen again.”

Next Time…Finding Out You Are a Toaster, or Why I Can’t Go Fishing.

You Can't Spell HEART Without the HA

2008-04-04T15:03:00.006-04:00

We can Rebuild him...We have the Technology...Better...Stronger...Faster.

My first real experience with blogging was when I wrote to a newspaper in response to the cancellation of the Six Million Dollar Man. Back then there weren't any blogs or entertainment sites on the Internet to give us an update that a show was gone. It just disappeared from the TV. Honestly, I thought the original Battlestar Galactica was on for three years. It only had 21 episodes. (We won't talk about Galactica 1980. Ever.)

I even had the Six Million Dollar Man action figure. There was even the space capsule that turned into an operating table. The action figure had a telescopic eye, the skin peeled back on one of the arms to reveal circuitry.

Don't know whatever happened to that figure. Probably sold it at a garage sale for $1. Its worth about $100 now.

In a few short weeks (probably), I'll be on my way to becoming the bionic man. However, I'm not getting the cool eye or super strong legs.

I'm getting an artificial heart valve.

Without it, I may be dead in five years.

I've used this space in the past to poke fun at members of the Blue Hippo Fantasy Football League. But now, I'm going to use this blog to talk about my experience with Heart Valve Replacement, you know...fun stuff.

Imagine being 39 years old and finding out that your heart is defective and has been your entire life. Go into the Doctors office for a routine physical, come out needing to have your chest cracked open and some doctor putting a fake valve in your heart.

Right at the start of Fishing Season. Yeah....Frakkin A it sucks.

But I imagine there are others out that may benefit from my experience. So, I hope this helps you in some way. If it does, drop me a line.

Tomorrow...Aortic Stenosis, Medical Condition or the 12th Cylon

STAND BYE

2007-09-09T17:05:00.001-04:00

I wnt 2 dvorc u

2006-11-10T12:57:00.000-05:00

Welcome to all the fans of K-Fed looking for more info on the Brittany/K-fed break up....All three of you.

Seriously...They were giving away tickets to Kevin Federline's concerts. His tour was cut short because of lack of interest.

Next stop for K-Fed? I see a future of bad reality show guest appearances, where that little midget guy from the Austin Powers Movies, pees on K-Fed'd head.

As we head into the second half of the Blue Hippo Fantasy Football Season, it's pretty much a toss up as to who will win this year...Except for Thong Song. Sorry Dave, even the Detroit Lions are better than you.

Prediction this week? Ronnie Rayguns are going down in flames. Just like the Republicans. (Ouch)

Someone spotted Mike walking around in circles on Wednesday mumbling something about .."Haggard wasn't even running!"

MADLIBS TIME

Fill in the Blank

Joe is taking (Person) out to (Noun) (Time of Day). Might we suggest (VERB) in the (Location). Try the (noun) either spicy or (Adjective). Hopefully the (Losing Detroit Professional Football Team) will (Verb).

Today is the 37th anniversary of Sesame Street. Its pretty sad when you are the same age as Sesame Street. The characters have changed a bit since I watched the show.

Bob hasn't aged much.

As a child, didn't you think that Bob the epitome of "nice guy neighbor/uncle"? Now, he looks like one of the guys picked up for soliciting minors on the internet. Speaking of which, there was a COO or CEO that was arrested for soliciting a 5 year old on the internet.

The chief executive of a small Warren-based credit union faces sex and drug charges after Macomb County sheriff's deputies arrested him for allegedly trying to arrange sex with a 5-year-old girl.

FIVE FRAKIN YEARS OLD.

I think Bob actually looks like a gay Owen Wilson.

Now for THE OTHER CHEEK

This Briton is one...Cheeky Bastard:

LONDON - A 22-year-old man suffered internal injuries after lighting a small firecracker he had inserted into his buttocks, paramedics said Thursday.
The incident took place Sunday, when Britain celebrated Bonfire Night, traditionally marked with fireworks to celebrate the Guy Fawkes gunpowder plot to blow up Parliament in the 17th century.

The man suffered burns and other unspecified internal injuries in the incident in Sunderland, 275 miles north of London.

Finally...Our Kessler's Moment.

Tomorrow is Veterans Day. Here's to our Veterans:

Hal -- Veteran of the War in the Gulf(of Mexico) and the Lost Battle for the Threeway.

Mark -- Veteran (still Active) of the War of the "Honestly Jean, I don't just go to West Pointe to drink with the guys. We go to Strip clubs too!"

Alex -- Veteran of the War on Receding Hairlines (He lost this one, but took it as a Man.)

Joe M. -- Veteran of an actual War.

Tale of Two Assholes

2006-11-06T11:56:00.000-05:00

Welcome to serfers looking for information on Michigan Gubernatorial Candidates Granholm and DeVos.

Sorry, but I am talking about a Chick with two assholes.

No...not Ann Coulter. I said "Chick".

Forzie the four-legged chicken will cluck no more.

The Te Uku-bred Barnevelder chick - hatched at Marlene Dickey's property at the start of last month - has died.

But it wasn't the extra legs that led to its death, more likely an extra anus, Mrs Dickey believes.
"He developed two bottoms and I think he got glugged up," she said.

While she was surprised by Forzie's death - he weighed a "good pound of butter" and was gaining feathers slowly - it was not totally unexpected, she said.
And it was fun while it lasted.

"He was a bit of a laugh."

Looking ungainly on its extra legs but twice as cute, the bird was an exception to the rule that chickens with defects are not normally born alive.

He was found dead on Friday and is now in the Dickeys' freezer waiting to be stuffed.

I Googled "Two Anus Chick", and along with a picture of Ron Mexico, I got this instead:

Gives another meaning to one of our regular features, "The Other Cheek".

Meanwhile, rumors have been flying that the League's only Canadian Franchise may be relocating to the hills of Kentucky. (Someone cue the music from Deliverance) When asked about the potential move, the Hairy Canuck said that he was looking into outsourcing his team to the Billy Bob's Hot Sister/Wife League. Wahwee WeeWah!

Tomorrow...

The results between the big match up. Yes...I'm talking about Poker Dawgs and the Ronnie Rayguns. Will this be a preview of this year's Blue Hippo Super Bowl?

Till tomorrow...vote early and often.

Vote No on Proposal 3

2006-11-02T15:33:00.000-05:00

Welcome all the anti-hunters that support Michigan's Ban on Dove Hunting. So you are going to Vote No on Proposal 3.

OK.

I think that in two years we should petition for a proposal that will allow us to vote to BAN fishing for Brook Trout, Perch and Bluegill.

These fish are not over populated.

There is not sufficient food on one fish for a meal.

Every summer, fishermen catch these small fish and sometimes they swallow the hook. The fish are thrown back into the water and later die.

There is evidence that Catch and Release kills more fish than it saves.

People like to stand on their docks and look at these fish swimming freely in the water. Therefore we should not catch them.

Sometimes hooks fall into the water and rust. Do you REALLY want to go swimming where you could get a rusty hook caught in your foot?

Perch are used to catch bigger fish. Imagine the pain these fish go through.

There are numerous larger fish you can fish for, why catch these small cute species? Nowhere in this proposal are we talking about hunting or other types of fishing.

Fishing is supported by BIG OUTDOORS like out of state companies like Cabelas, Gander Mountain and Bass Pro. None of these stores have their home office in Michigan.

If you vote NO on Proposal 3, then you will HAVE TO VOTE YES to ban these types of fishing when it comes around.

Democrats Is So Stupid

2006-11-02T12:20:00.000-05:00

Welcome to Republican Mike, who made the above phrase famous.

Just so our friends in Charlestown can get all the Jokes, I'm posting the picture that Ben was referencing. Also...its just Damn Funny. Nice October Surprise Kerry, you twat.

This is the best the Democrats can do? Yeah it was just a flubbed joke, but holy Hamburgers, this is exactly why the Democratic party is such a mess. Him and Cindy Sheehan.
I'd rather vote for Borat.

A Quickie

2006-11-01T09:28:00.000-05:00

Welcome to all web serfers looking for info on Viagra. And if your erection lasts for more than 4 hours, I suggest you don't have sex before heading off to work.

Quick joke.

One day, Justin came came home and was greeted by his wife Jayne dressed in a very sexy nightie.

"Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want."

So Justin tied her up and went fishing.

I'll be here all night. Try the Veal, its very good and please remember to tip your waitress.

Pumpkin Porn

2006-10-31T15:24:00.000-05:00

Welcome to all the perverts who use the word Porn in their search engines. What's really scary is that you are actually looking for Pumpkin Porn. What exactly were you going to do with that pumpkin? What do you think, that just because Republicans now think its "trendy" to be pedofiles, all you GOPers can come out of the closet with your sick perversions. Here is a picture of Former Congressman Foley's Pumkin from last year.

Meanwhile, its Halloween. The Night is also known as the Festival of Samhain or Oíche Shamhna to the Irish, Calan Gaeaf to the Welsh, Allantide to the Cornish and Hop-tu-Naa to the Manx.
Halloween is also called Pooky Night in some parts of Ireland.

Pooky Night?

In the state of Utah and throughout the world where members of the Mormon faith reside, Halloween is an occasion when the trunks of cars are decorated and the cars parked at the church where "trick-or-treaters" go from trunk to trunk and there are prizes for those best decorated, a phenomenon known as "trunk-or-treating"

Silly Mormons.

I've been overdosing on Scarey films the past 10 days. Saw FRankenstein at the Old Redford Theatre last Friday. AMC has had its Monsterfest going on. Creature from the Black Lagoon is still a great movie...but I hate the Hellraiser movies.

Best Movie of the Week?

Shaun: As Mr. Sloan always says, there is no "I" in team, but there is an "I" in pie. And there's an "I" in meat pie. Meat is the anagram of team... I don't know what he was talking about.

Don't think this is going to become a habit.....

Everything is New Again

2006-10-30T14:41:00.000-05:00

You never thought it would happen.

Nearly eight weeks into the Fantasy Football season you had pretty much given up all hope of seeing it happen. Week after week you are disappointed and let down.

But finally, here, in week eight, you got it.

A Win. Congrats Thong Song. You’re as good as the Detroit Lions.

In Other News....

The U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission today charged Delphi Corp. and 13 people, including former chairman J.T. Battenberg III, with financial fraud, accusing them of manipulating Delphi’s earnings between 2000 and 2004

Meanwhile, the Blue Hippo League is investigating Delphi employee and Poker Dawgs owner Joe concerning his scores since 2000.

“There’s been definitely some inflation on the Dawg’s part over the years. Why, I’ve even seen some “discrepencies" while measuring the length of Fish caught on the fishing trips,” said Luke SkyAuger’s owner Mark. Mark is also under investigation for inflating fish sizes on Fishing trips.

November is National Reading Month

We are asking team owners around the league what they are reading:

Hal: Fields of Fire by James Webb. It contains an interesting way to greet someone. Brother’s don’t shake..they……um…
Ben Roberts: Sisters by Lynne Cheney. Now we know why her daughter turned out the way she did.
Joe: Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. Actually, its just the jacket cover. I have a Mad Magazine underneath. He he he…The Black Spy killed the White Spy with an anvil!
Dave: A Series of Unfortunate Events
Scott: Blogging for Dummies
Justin: Inside Job: Unmasking the 9/11 conspiracies by Jim Marrs
Chris: The Rector of Justin: A Novel by Louis Auchincloss. I misread the second word of the title.
Mark E. Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil by John Berendt. I KNEW that Transvestite sounded familiar!
Mark A: One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish. I thought it was about how to catch fish. Better yet, I bought the audio book version.
Brian: The Desperate Housewives Cookbook. I thought there’d be more photos of Eva Longoria in nothing but an apron.

........More later

Glassmaster

2006-07-13T09:15:00.000-04:00

Welcome visitors of this blog looking for famed glass blowers living in Murano, Italy.

This entry is about a completely different type of Glassmaster. This one floats, has a fish finder and seats four comfortably.

Say hello to my little friend.

Its as old as I am and more than twice my size (as most people in this world are). It needs a little bit of TLC (as I do from time to time) but it floats (which is something I have a hard time doing) and it finds fish (again, something I have a hard time doing).

Stats:

1969 Glassmaster Boat
15ft long (but I suspect it might be longer)
55 hp / 2 cycle engine
Electric Start
Fishfinder
Two way marine radio
Two 5 gallon gas tanks
Four seats (fold down for more room)
Bilge pump
Fishing pole holders

Now...Who wants to go Fishing???????

P.S. More good news. Rumor has it that there is an Arrested Development movie in the works, being produced by Ron Howard. This is not to be confused with the porno film A Breasted Development, being produced by Chris. (See the Evatt Blog for updates)

I Would Like to Thank Xenu for Making All This Possible

2006-07-07T11:43:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Scientology visitors. Have I a deal for you! In honor of the South Park episode ripping your beloved cult...cough...religion being nominated for an Emmy, I am offering you a special deal on a new "religion".

Scottology.

Its the SAME as Scientology...only cheaper. Send me only $1,000. (that's nearly $99,000 off the Hubbard price!!!!) You get everything that Scientology offers, including a list of really weird names to call your kid. How about Phlem? That one's a freebee just for signing up today.

Plus, you can quit at any time! We won't make you stay in a hotel in Clearwater for days without water and let you be bitten by cockroaches or refuse to take you to the nearest hospital.

Call Now!!!!

Well, well, well.....The Emmy nominations came out yesterday and what comedy series garnered FOUR mentions?

Which at this writing was still cancelled and NOT picked up by Showtime.

Best Comedy Series
Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Best Writing for a Comedy Series
Single-Camera Picture Editing for a Comedy

I hope they win at least one statue so they can take it and show it up the arse of FOX Entertainment Executives.

Rovian Conundrum

2006-07-06T16:46:00.000-04:00

Welcome to those of you looking for info on possible Karl Rove misdeeds. Sadly we will never see this happen:

Even sadder is the fact that today, I find out that The Wiz Kid himself is a Pike. Yes, THAT Pike. Capital P. Pi Kappa Alpha.

Sigh...

Good news is, Jon Stewart from The Daily Show is a Pike also.

And balance was returned to the world.

Fantasy Football starts again real soon. Saw a FF Magazine in the checkout line of Kroger's the other day. I'm back searching for a QB again. Seems like this ONE position always makes me or breaks me.

First round draft pick this year.

I've got a few more fishing tales up my sleeve till then....

Kesslers from a Groggy, Svepa or Gorsk

2006-06-06T09:48:00.000-04:00

Welcome to visitors looking for IKEA brand products. The new store opens in Canton Michigan tomorrow. People have been lining up for DAYS to be first in this store. That’s just crazy…crazy like going to Duke Fest and getting a picture with Lance and Coy Duke, huh Chris?

Anywho…

The two newbies on our Spring Men’s Fishing Trip both caught Fish. Alex landed his first fish ever, a nice fat bluegill and later brought in a small perch, which he proceeded to pet and caress it in a soft, gentle way, whispering soon to be broken promises and uttering failed dreams. After the love-making, Alex tossed the perch overboard. Such is life and love.

Avery, (4 ½) not planning on being outdone by Alex, also landed a nice perch. Here’s a good picture.

Avery's Dad, Hal, did the obligatory shot of Kesslers. We finished off a bit more than a pint of Kessler this year. Not bad, but it could have been better. I have a feeling that we will need a lot more this fall for the trip, which I am hoping that a lot of you can make. I'm looking into a cottage on Houghton Lake...but more on that later in another blog entry.

By the way, Avery has now officially caught more fish than Chris and Gary combined on our fishing trips. He also did a mighty fine job of getting Uncle Scott a beer and being able to pee over the side of the boat, a requirement that Ben has yet to fulfill.

Stopped off in Pinconning on the way up to Gladwin at the famous Pinconning Cheese Factory. You can’t miss it; it has a large mouse in the front. Not to be confused with the Cheese Factory that has a large Cow in the Front. Apparently in Pinconning, Large Mammals and Food products make great Signs. Just don’t forget to avert your eyes as you pass the Pinconning Mountain Oyster Factory.

Picked up some Squeeky Cheese. They’ve taken the best of Cheese Curd, processed it, and made it into something they can charge $5 a pound for. Why is it squeaky? When you find out, make sure everyone is not downwind at the time.

Tomorrow: The Tackle that Time Forgot

Giant Spider Attacks Detroit

2006-06-02T16:49:00.000-04:00

Welcome to all visitors suffering from Arachnophobia.

A Giant Spider is loose and Attacking the Renaissance Center in Detroit. What can YOU do to prevent injury or death? Tune into Channel 4 News at 11 for more details...

Meanwhile, have a safe weekend. I'll add more stories and photos from the fishing trip on Monday (if we are all still here by then....)

Of Justin, Bait and Men

2006-06-01T16:30:00.000-04:00

Welcome to visitors of this blog looking for info on the star of the Award winning and Funniest Show on TV, Arrested Development. As of this writing, Arrested Development is still Cancelled.

There is an old quote that goes:

"If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles."

Well, Justin must really be concentrating, because he's short one rod and reel.
Here is a Picture of Justin expertly handling a nice Bass he caught up at Lake Lancer.

Unfortunately, as Lord Grey said, "It is our lost fish that I believe stay longest in memory, and seize upon our thoughts whenever we look back on fishing."

Later that morning, as we were preparing to move to another location, a fish took Justin's pole and yanked it over the side of the boat in about 12 feet of water. Not to worry. Joe threw a powder sugar donut hole on the water to mark the spot where the rod and reel is.

Dave hopes to put his deep sea diving skills to the test this summer and look for the rod and reel.

Good news though. Justin got his bait back Here is a sample of what the Killer Lure looked like...except that it was green.

He had earlier caught a fish (or was that later?) on the tried and true for Lake Lancer: the Red Worm (Zoom or Berkely Brand) with a gold bullet head sinker.

Joe takes credit for discovering this one some years ago. It still works well today. Joe caught his monster 20 inch bass on the worm. Here's a picture of it:

Justin caught his Bass on the red worm also. It's a must-have for our tackle boxes now. It even works on Clear Lake. My young nephew Mitch caught the largest fish of his life on a red worm last year. I have pretty good luck with it myself, except when I change things up a bit. More on that tomorrow.

Finally today, I leave you with a group shot from the trip. The very hairy one there is Justin.

NEXT TIME: See the Little Man catch a fish (no...I'm not talking about me)

The Other Cheek

LOST wrapped up its second season last week. I finally saw the first 20 minutes I missed because I was in Iowa. No..I don't think the bird said Hurley's name, unless his name is "Hurrrraaareee!"

Speaking of LOST, I guess the ending to last week's show proves that they are not in Purgatory. Sorry Justin, you lost the "Lost: Guys...Where ARE We" contest. Now, we never mention Purgatory ever again, because you know what happens...

Delphi Strike-Force Leads Weekend

2006-06-01T08:07:00.000-04:00

Welcome to all the Auto Supply Workers that are worried about the future of their company. This is from today's Free Press:

Delphi asked federal bankruptcy court to void the Union contracts, allowing the company to cut wages unilaterally. The UAW has threatened to strike if that happens.

There is one good thing. Whoever came up with the marketing idea to put your logo on the Rapala Rattling Lure is a genius. Hopefully his or her job doesn't belong to a resident of India right now.

Joe finished first on the Spring Mens' Fishing Trip by landing 7 fish over the 1 and a half days. Joe took an early morning lead of three fish, two of which were using the Delphi Strike-Force Lure. Here is photo pf Joe with one of his smaller Bass:

Speaking of Bass, we planned on clearing Lake Lancer of its over over-abundant Pike. The Michigan DNR opened Pike Fishing on the lake this year to a No-Size Limit / 5 limit haul.

We scauffed at Justin who wanted to bring up Lasagne. Who wants to eat Lasagne when there will be a large fish fry?!?!?

Try as we might, we didn't land one pike. Joe almost had a Pike (not nearly McCall Rules, but close) but it got away. By the end of Saturday, the left behind lasagne was starting to sound pretty good.

Joe, after a quick leap into first place, then headed toward the largest fish. We didn't put any money on Largest Fish this year, just the most fish.

That's when Joe landed, with the help of the Delphi Strike-Force, a 20 inch, 3.5 lb Bass; beating the old record by about an inch. Joe and Scott had dueling Bass two summers ago: Joe landed a 19 inch Bass on Lake Lancer and Scott landed a 19 inch Bass on Clear Lake. SAME WEEK.

Now Joe was all alone in the Monster Bass category.

"Maybe we should change the betting pool to largest fish," commented Joe, "it give everyone a chance at the money."

Yeah Right. Nice Try. No...we were sticking with most fish.

Here is another vicim of the Strike-Force Lure. I don't think it's Joe's 20-incher though. This one looks a bit smaller. Justin, looking on, is probably wondering why Dow Paint doesn't design a killer lure. Ah well, at least he has a nice new reel for his rod.

By the end of the Morning run on the lake, it was Joe 3 Bass, Scott 2 Bass, Dave 1 Bass, Alex 1 Bluegill and Justin coming up with a surprising 2 Bass. Yes...Justin had two. All by himself. By Breakfast he was in the running.

NEXT: The Ones That Got Away

Also...Please send me your pictures. And help me out with the ten-year timeline. I'm also working on a surprise for the Fall Trip. If it works out, it will be awesome. If not, forget I wrote this.

Your Comments are welcome...